


The Switch Up

by quackquackbi



Series: The Switch Up Series [1]
Category: Black Friday - Team StarKid, The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Barneston, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, Multi, Not Canon Compliant, Paulkins - Freeform, Reposted from Self, The Switch Up Series, if you don't like those you can fuck off I'm tired of being nice, self-inserts, tedgens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:50:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26750161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quackquackbi/pseuds/quackquackbi
Summary: A reposting of the birthday fic I wrote for myself back in March 2020. Very self-indulgent. If you think self-inserts are "cringy" than I encourage you to find a different fic.Ash and her online friends wake up to find themselves in Hatchetfield as their OC's... but not just any version of Hatchetfield. It's the version from their groupchat's role play!
Relationships: Ethan Green/Original Character, Henry Hidgens/Ted, Hot Chocolate Boy/Original Character, Original Character & Hannah Foster, Original Character(s) & Others
Series: The Switch Up Series [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947892
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1: Role-Playing

School drones on as boring as ever, and Ash hates it. She’s in her last year, thank God, but graduation is still several months away. It certainly can’t come soon enough, that’s for sure.

Sitting in her second period English class, she tries to pay attention to the discussion they’re having about the field trip they’d taken yesterday to see a production of Dracula. One of her classmates, Zach— who sits right behind her and is rather obnoxious sometimes, but popular— is talking about how there was a second actor to play the Wolf Man form of the title character, and he’d walk around through the seating in the unconventionally-shaped theatre. The Wolf Man had even jump-scared one of the audience members from behind. 

Ash had already known that it would happen, having seen the show with her grandparents just a couple weeks prior, during Fall Break. 

“I was on the edge of my seat during that part of the show,” she admits, surprising herself and her classmates since she doesn’t normally contribute in class discussions.

“Have you seen it before?” their teacher, Mrs. McKinnley, asks knowingly, and Ash nods sheepishly.

“My grandparents take me to go see it every year,” she says softly. “And, um… I actually played the little girl for two seasons back in elementary school.”

“Wait, how long have they been doing this show?” Someone asks, and Ash shrugs.

“Twenty years, at least,” she says. “Most of the cast rotates, but it’s been the same Renfield since their first season. He’s phenomenal.”

“I liked when he humped that chair,” another student pipes up, making the whole class laugh.

“Wait, so—” Zach cuts in again. “If you know the show so well, why were you scared of the Wolf Man?”

“I was sitting in the back row,” Ash clarifies. “I was nervous I’d be the one he’d scare. I don’t really take well to jump scarers touching me…”

“So if I were to try to jump scare you…?” Zach trails off, inching his hands up like he’s going to grab her shoulders suddenly.

“I’d punch you in the face,” Ash says flatly, without any hesitation. “My fight or flight reflex is heavily weighted toward fight.”

The whole class starts laughing again as Zach just splutters in response.

The class ends a few minutes later, and Ash heads toward her third period, where they’re watching a movie today. Before the teacher turns off the lights, Ash quickly lowers her phone’s screen brightness all the way down. The movie—  _ Gone With the Wind _ — starts playing, but Ash doesn’t pay much attention. 

She scrolls through her phone instead, reading fanfiction.

The rest of the day, with exceptions to band and drama, is much the same. Her fourth period physics class is boring, sixth period study hall is nothing but phone time. Fifth period, her drama class, is a little unusual. They’re having a pizza party to celebrate the in-school Halloween show they’d just put together the previous week, and watching  _ A Very Potter Musical _ , which was suggested by one of Ash’s classmates (actually the one who had introduced her to it back in the seventh grade, although the two are no longer exactly friends).

Band is seventh period, where they’re putting together music for the Christmas concert.

The moment the final bell rang, Ash packs up her trumpet and bolts toward the parking lot to her car. She has to sit there for a couple minutes to let the car warm up in the early November air, but soon enough she’s driving home. She plays the soundtrack of last year’s Starkid show,  _ The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals _ , and sings along at the top of her lungs.

When she gets home, Ash rushes through her homework and grabs a snack before heading to her room and booting up her laptop. She opens the link for her digital ticket of  _ this  _ year’s Starkid show, one that is currently going. She’s already watched the digital ticket three times, but she only has four hours left with it before it expires, so she decides to get one more viewing in while she still can.

Her phone buzzes constantly with notifications from the group chat, but she doesn’t want to be distracted so she silences it for now.

  * ~<>~•



Her parents practically have to drag her out of her room for dinner, where they try to get her to talk to them.

Except Ash hasn’t had much desire to talk to them since she came out as bisexual and her mother cried, and her father punched a hole in the wall.

Since that day— nearly three months ago, now— they’d acted like nothing had happened. Ash went along with it for the most part, never mentioning her crushes on female classmates and actresses. She doesn’t talk about politics, doesn’t talk about her friends online, doesn’t talk about so many other things that Ash would  _ love _ to talk to her parents about, if only they were a little more accepting of who she was. She hasn’t bothered to tell them about her gender identity crisis and subsequent name-change.

If only they didn’t try to sweep her under the rug like a dirty secret they didn’t want to get out.

  * ~<>~•



It’s nearly midnight, and she knows she should be asleep, but she isn’t. She can’t. The bright screen of her phone, less than a foot away from her face, is too distracting. She hasn’t been this invested in something in a long time. Her friends, other teens she’s never actually met before, are all awake, too. 

Lucy and Cara are in the UK, so it’s even worse for them. It’s five AM for them. Megs and Theo are in Ash’s own timezone, though. At least it’s a Saturday and none of them have to worry about school in a few hours.

She can hear her cat breathing from the chair next to the foot of her bed, and one of the dogs is curled into the back of Ash’s knees, snoring hard.

Ash’s eyes track the group conversation as new messages come rolling in.

_ //Did you guys catch the part where Ethan mentioned a cousin named Oliver?  _ Theo asks them, using the slashes to indicate they’re speaking out of character—

Oh yeah, their group chat is a role-playing group chat. Ash’s playing Lex and Hannah, two sisters from a musical called Black Friday. Theo is playing a boy named Tim, as well as his dad, Tom. Cara’s playing the aforementioned Ethan (who is Lex’s boyfriend) as well as a guy named Paul. Lucy plays Emma, Paul’s kinda-girlfriend, and Tom’s kinda-girlfriend, Becky. Megs is playing a kooky professor who doesn’t actually appear in this show, but was in the previous one alongside Paul and Emma. 

Each of them except Ash is also playing a self-insert character. Ash isn’t, only because she hasn’t decided on how to incorporate her into the story yet. She has, however, recently picked up a third canon character, also from the previous show, named Ted. The group had decided that Ted was Lex and Hannah’s dad, and now they’re running with it.

Anyways.

Cara replies to Theo’s question.  _ //The leash line? Yeah, what about it? _

Ash snickers to herself.  _ //Isn’t a popular name for Hot Chocolate Kid “Oliver”? OMG what if it’s him??? _

_ //Nick said somewhere that Hot Choco’s name is Peter, I’m pretty sure. _ Megs adds in, and Ash frowns.

_ //Damn, I’ll have to fix it in that fanfic I’ve been writing. I’ve been calling him Oliver this whole time. _

Oops, she hadn’t meant to tell them about her fic. She’s very self-conscious about her writing, and has rarely ever posted any of it. Never finished what she did post, and eventually she’d delete it.

The chat explodes into questions about her fic, and Ash— despite priding herself on being a quick reader— can hardly keep up.

_ //NO YOU CAN’T READ IT! _ She eventually tells them, and adds why in a second message. 

Ash’s eyes start to grow heavy as midnight approaches, and she gently smacks herself to stay awake.

_ //Guys. Roleplay. _

That snaps everyone back into character, and they continue on with the scene. They quickly finish the wedding and move on to a time-skip to the next day, where Ted gets a phone call from his former landlord about a squatter in his apartment. He takes Hannah with him to deal with it, because she begs him to not leave her behind.

Ash’s eyes start to cross, and she has to set the phone down for a second as a wave of nausea hits her out of nowhere. She sends a quick out of character “brb”, not noticing when the others are all doing the exact same.

Rushing to the bathroom, Ash heaves into the toilet. Next comes a wave of dizziness, static filling her vision as she stumbles backward. 

The last thing she hears as she passes out is the grandfather clock chiming midnight.


	2. Chapter 2: A New World

Ash wakes up with someone pressed into her on either side, arms wrapped around protectively behind, and a smaller body curled into her from the front. She shifts subtly to figure out what’s going on, and freezes when she sees the small child clinging to her, and barely turns her head to see the familiar face behind her. 

_ Who is this small child, and why is Robert Manion spooning me? _

Her squirming wakes him a little, and he mumbles to himself before pressing his face to the crook of her neck. The little girl whimpers, and Ash instinctively holds her tighter.  _ What  _ is going on?

Eventually, she realizes how bad she has to pee, and carefully squirms out of both her cuddle buddies’ grasps. They cling to each other instead, and Ash darts to the nearest bathroom. She finds herself in a familiar hallway, and frowns. 

Her grandparents always kept pictures on practically every inch of the walls in this hallway, but now they’re totally bare. The wall paper is a weird color, too, an ugly shade of pale orange, instead of the pale brownish-gray. Come to think of it, the walls in the front bedroom she’d woken up in were a different color, too. 

She peeks inside the middle bedroom, surprised to see such different furniture. There’s no clutter, either, and a pair of familiar faces sleeping in the bed. Is that... Lauren Lopez and Jon Matteson?

_ Oh, Jesus.  _

Ash finally ducks into the bathroom and tries to catch her breath as she uses the toilet. Her only thought is,  _ Is this the fucking role-play?! _ She knows it can’t be, but deep down she knows it is. Somehow, she’s found herself in the universe of the roleplay she’s been doing the last couple of weeks with her new online friends. 

And she thinks that somehow she’s become Lex Foster. It’s the only reason Robert—  _ Ethan Green! _ — would be cuddling her in their sleep, why a five year old girl that looked suspiciously like a younger Kendall Nicole Yakshe would be clinging to Ash like that. 

When she comes out of the bathroom, she runs right into someone else she never expected to see. 

“Ashley?!” Megs hisses incredulously. 

“Megs?!” Ash whispers back, not even noticing the use of her deadname-- not that she ever told anyone about it. “What the hell? What are you doing here?”

“Me?” She scoffs. “What about you? Either of us! And I’m pretty sure Theo, Cara, and Lucy were in the room I just came from...”

“Our roleplay group,” Ash whispers. “Oh, Jesus... this is starting to— nope, still makes no sense.”

“What do you mean?” Megs asks quietly. “Where are we?”

“Um, I’m pretty sure we’re in the roleplay,” Ash says, wincing. “I just woke up in that bedroom down there, being spooned by Ethan Green. And I was holding Hannah in my arms. And I think Paul and Emma are in this room here—“ she points to the middle bedroom— “and this is a really weird version of my grandparents’ house, so it kinda makes sense? I mean, I did base the Sims build on it, and then we used it for the R-P, so...”

“But why are we here?” Megs asks, and Ash shrugs. 

“We should probably go talk to Theo and the others,” she says. “Figure out what to do...”

Megs nods. “Right...” she mutters, and leads the way into what had been the master bedroom, but was now another guest room with two sets of bunk beds, as well as another single bed in the center. There’s a little boy sleeping in that bed, and each of the other bunks (save for the one Megs must have been in) are occupied by faces as familiar as Megs’. 

Theo is just sitting up in their bottom bunk, looking around in confusion. They see the little boy first, then they look over to Ash and Megs in the doorway. Their confusion clearly only grows, and they get out of bed to go over to the girls. Megs goes and gently wakes Lucy and Cara, and she and Ash quickly and quietly explain what they know so far. 

The group of five talk for a few minutes, then agree to go back to bed for now. If they’re still in this universe when they wake up, then they’ll decide where to go from there— most likely, they’ll go along with whatever’s going on, and try to get an explanation from Webby if they can contact her somehow. 

Ash glances back as she heads down the hall to the front bedroom. She slips back into bed, opting to just hold Hannah between her and Ethan instead of trying to get back between them. 

Thoughts swirl around her mind as she falls into an uneasy sleep. 

  * ~<>~•



A few hours later, Ash wakes up again in an empty bed. At first she sighs in relief, thinking she’s back in her own bed and that last night had been some kind of strange dream. But then she opens her eyes and sees herself in the alternate version of her grandparents’ front bedroom. The one with the weird wall color, no posters or kids books or toys. 

The Hidgens house version. 

She groans quietly, burying her face in the pillow. After a few minutes, Ash gets up and decides to head to the kitchen for some food, but there isn’t much to be found in the fridge or pantry. She can hear voices from the living room, and goes to investigate. 

Ethan and Hannah are both up, and Ethan is letting her color on his arm with a sharpie. She’s drawing a blue flower, and she and Ethan both look up when they hear Ash come in. She’s fully expecting them to call her Lex, but they don’t. 

“Hey, Ash,” Ethan says. “Wanna join us?”

She takes a second to process, then nods quietly. She sits down next to Ethan, trying to figure out what to say. He kisses the side of her head, and Ash bites her lip. Holding her arm out to Hannah, she gives the girl a small smile. 

“Can I have one?” She asks, and Hannah nods happily before getting to work on a pattern of red and black swirls. 

“What’s wrong, babe?” Ethan asks. There’s no trace of Robert Manion’s australian accent. 

“Nothing,” Ash mumbles. “Just... got a lot on my mind, you know?”

Ethan nods. “Mr. Houston and Becky went back into town to get supplies. Groceries and sh— stuff, um... but before they left, Becky said my concussion’s fine. So at least you don’t have to worry about that on top of everything else that happened yesterday.”

“That’s good,” Ash replies softly. Someone else comes in, and all three look up to see who it is. 

An older man with silver hair is staring at them from the doorway, confusion evident on his face. His hand inches toward something inside his blazer, and Ash hurriedly grabs Hannah and holds her close. The five year old squirms, but she doesn’t protest. 

“Emma brought us here,” Ash says quickly. “The world’s kinda gone... crazy.”

“So I’ve seen,” the man replies carefully. “Emma who?”

“Emma Perkins,” Ethan says, eyeing the man distrustfully. “One of your students, apparently. You  _ are  _ Professor Hidgens, right?”

The man, Hidgens, nods, and glances to Hannah and Ash briefly before leaving the room again. Ethan gets up and chases after him. Ash follows, Hannah in her arms, knowing where this was going. 

“Where have you been, anyway?” Ethan asks suspiciously. “Emma said you were a— a—“

“Doomsday survivalist,” Ash says softly, and Ethan nods. 

“Yeah, that,” he says. “We figured you’d, you know,  _ be here _ when the actual doomsday started happening, instead of God knows where.”

“Ethan—“ Hannah starts. 

The professor takes it in stride. “I was out of town for a teachers’ conference,” he says. “Mandatory. Annual.”

“Why do you have a whole lab in your basement?” Ethan continues. “You know, when Emma said you were a doomsday survivalist, I thought you were crazy. The lab really isn’t helping that.”

“You are in  _ my  _ home, boy,” Hidgens says warningly. 

“So what?” Ethan snaps. “It’s true! You claim to be ready for the apocalypse, then you aren’t even here when it starts!”

“Ethan—“ Ash tries, but she’s interrupted by the professor. 

“Get out,” he says. “Get out of my home. Everyone else can stay, but I want you out. You’re not welcome here.”

Ethan sneers at him, and Hannah starts crying. “No!” She sobs. “Please, don’t make him go! Please!”

Ash rubs Hannah’s back soothingly. “Please, professor,” she adds. “He has a concussion. It’s not safe out there.”

Hidgens glances between the three of them before relenting with a huff. “Fine,” he allows. “He can stay— but only if he apologizes.”

Ethan opens his mouth, protest clear in his eyes, until Ash glares at him pointedly and he sighs. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles. “I’m sorry for being rude...”

“Thank you,” Hidgens says stiffly, and retreats to the basement. 

Ethan rolls his eyes and storms off to the front bedroom. Hannah squirms until Ash sets her down, and races off after him. Ash sighs, and heads to the room where the others from the group chat had been. They’re all still there, although the little boy is gone. 

Theo and Megs are sitting on one of the bottom bunks together, talking quietly. They both look up when Ash comes. 

“We’re all still here,” Theo says, their voice kind of nervous. 

“Yeah,” Ash says, grimacing. “Hidgens just came home and almost kicked Ethan out. Hannah and I managed to convince him otherwise. It looks like I’ve totally replaced Lex, by the way.”

“Ooh,” Megs teases. “You and Ethan, then, huh?”

Ash blushes. “Shush. That’s not exactly important right now,” she says quietly. “We need to figure out either how to get home, or how to get through all this. Like, now we’re gonna have to go through everything we put them through! Hidgens is gonna try to apotheo-size us.”

“Fuck, I forgot about that,” Theo mumbles quietly. “What are we gonna do? Can we try to stop him preemptively?”

“I don’t think so,” Megs says. “We just have to hope that Hannah can convince him on her own— the rest of us are gonna be knocked the fuck out, remember?”

“I don’t like the idea of letting her deal with it herself,” Ash admits. “I know I’ve only had her for like, an hour of being awake, but I swear to God if anything happens to her...”

Megs sighs. “We’re all gonna get too attached to  _ want  _ to leave, aren’t we?” She asks softly. 

Ash grimaces. “Yeah, I think I’m already at that point.”

“You’re just saying that because you know you’ve got Ethan now,” Theo teases. 

“I’m gonna kill you both,” Ash deadpans, leaving the room. She can hear both her friends laughing quietly behind her, but she ignores them. She heads to the front bedroom, where Hannah has fallen asleep clinging to Ethan, who is staring absently out the large window. 

Ash gently knocks on the open door to get his attention. Ethan lays Hannah out, making her let go of him, and comes over to hug Ash. She sinks into it, oddly at ease by the physical affection he’s giving her. She sighs into his jacket. 

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” Ethan mumbles into her hair. “About everything yesterday. I should’ve protected her better. I should’ve protected  _ you— _ “

“You couldn’t have done anything,” Ash says softly. “I’m okay now, and part of that is because I know you and Hannah are okay.”

Ethan kisses her forehead, and Ash tries not to blush. Apparently, she isn’t that successful, because the next words out of Ethan’s mouth are, “You’re so cute when you blush.”

“‘S your fault,” Ash mumbles, pressing her face into his jacket. 

“It’s so easy to do, though,” Ethan teases. “How can I resist?” He kisses the top of her head and tightens his arms around her. “I love you, Ash.”

“Love you too,” she responds instinctively. Her heart is racing, and she wonders if it’s wrong to be enjoying this. They stand there in silence for a few moments, and Hannah sleeps peacefully. 

Ash almost falls asleep in Ethan’s arms, standing up. He easily picks her up and lays her out next to Hannah, where she really does fall asleep. Ethan heads out of the room and runs into Theo. 

“Oh, hey,” they say awkwardly. “Um... what’s up?”

“Oh, you know,” Ethan sighs. “My head hurts, but the nausea’s gone at least. Ash and Hannah are both asleep again. I— I almost kissed Ash for real. You know how she’s demi... we’ve been dating for almost a year and a half, and I still haven’t been able to kiss her.”

Theo quirks one brow. “Yeah, and? Shouldn’t you, as her boyfriend, respect that?”

“I do!” Ethan says quickly. “I’ll wait as long as she wants me to! I just... I really wanna kiss her. I know you’re ace and probably don’t understand as much—“

“I’m still  _ romantically  _ attracted to people,” Theo snickers. “I get the desire to kiss and make out better than you’d think.”

Ethan groans. “I’m shit at explaining,” he mutters. “I’m just trying to say—“

“I get it,” Theo interrupts. “Really, I know what you mean.”

Ethan sighs in relief. Theo pats his back awkwardly. “Talk to her,” they suggest. “Tell her how you feel. Maybe she’s more ready than you think and she’s just waiting for you to make the first move.”

He nods. “I— I will,” he mumbles. “When she wakes up, though. I don’t wanna bother her. She needs the sleep.”

“We all do,” Theo agrees, fighting their own yawn. “I might go lay back down myself. Yesterday was...”

“Intense?” Ethan says knowingly, and Theo nods before flashing a peace sign and heading back to bed. 

Ethan frowns, and goes and sits down on the professor’s back porch as he thinks about what his twin had said. He definitely  _ wants _ to talk to Ash about this, but he knows how much it means to her that he’s never pushed the subject before. Her last boyfriend (and the only one she’s had beside Ethan) wasn’t so patient, and it had left her putting up walls that Ethan’s been spending the last seventeen months (and counting) trying to get past. It had taken almost two months just for her to tell him that she wanted to change her name-- well, after she’d figured it out for herself, anyway. 

He shakes his head to clear his thoughts. 

_ The goddamn apocalypse is happening out there, _ he reminds himself.  _ Either do something for her, or focus on something else. Either way, I gotta stop moping about this. _


	3. Chapter 3: Apotheo-sizing

Cara and Lucy sit at the kitchen table that evening, sharing a pack of half-stale pop tarts. It’s practically all the professor has left in his pantry. He’d claimed it was because he’d been out of town all week, but the girls knew better thanks to a line from one of the shows in their own world.

Theo comes to join them, plopping down in a chair next to Lucy.

“Fucking naps,” they say. “Never do shit for me.”

“Why does my arm hurt so much?” Cara mumbles, flexing her wrist and wincing.

“Didn’t you sprain it or something yesterday?” Lucy asks, voice low so that only her two friends can hear her. “Like… you were projecting something at the beginning of the chat, remember? So you said your self-insert had a sprained wrist from a fight trying to escape the mall.”

Cara groans. “Fuck, I forgot all about that,” she groans. “Now I’m stuck with a damn sprained wrist.” Her eyes widen suddenly. “You don’t think we’re all gonna suffer from what-- you know, what we said…?”

“Looks like it,” Theo says softly, nodding toward where Megs is emerging from the bedroom with bruises all over her arms and neck. Theo looks down at their own hands, wincing when they see the scrapes and bruises on the knuckles. They hold one hand up for the others to see.

“Damn,” Lucy whistles. “I’m so glad I didn’t say anything like that for mine…”

“Nah, you just decided to make Em--” Theo cuts themself off when someone other than the friend group enters the kitchen.

Six year old Tim shyly waves, biting his lip, his stuffed cat in his arm. Theo gets up and goes over to him, feeling an odd pull toward the child they’d portrayed. They help him get something to eat, being gentle and patient at his pickiness. 

As he finally eats, he glances up occasionally between the four teens at the table with him. Theo introduces their friends to him, and then themself. When they say their own name, Tim squeezes his stuffed cat closer to him. Theo (the teenage enby) smirks.

“Is that your cat’s name?” they say, pretending to not already know the answer, and Tim nods.

Emma Perkins passes through the kitchen, heading straight to a bathroom and locking the door behind her. The sound of vomiting can be heard, and Lucy winces, knowing this is her fault. She’s the one who’d decided…

Oops.

  * ~<>~•



Ash wakes up alone once again, but not really. Someone else is in the room, seated at the only piece of furniture that stayed the same from the original version of her grandparents’ house. It’s an electric keyboard, and Hannah’s sitting on the stool of it, poking at one of the keys curiously. 

She’s got the headphones on, so Ash can’t hear the notes, but she can guess by Hannah’s mischievous giggles that the girl has it set to that “random noises” setting, and is making the guy grunt over and over again.

Slipping out of the bed quietly, Ash manages to unplug the headphones without the five year old noticing at first, and snickers when her guess was correct. She’d done the same exact thing when she was Hannah’s age.

Hannah jumps when she presses the key again, but no sound comes out of the headphones. She turns and sees Ash, and has an oddly guilty look on her face.

“Funny noise,” she mumbles, and Ash nods in agreement.

“You hungry, Banana?” she asks softly. The child shrugs, and Ash frowns. She picks up the little girl and carries her out to the kitchen, seeing the others. Exchanging a short look with each of her friends, Ash sets Hannah in a chair at the table, right next to Tim, who shyly offers her some pop tarts. 

Ash looks around with her brows furrowed. 

“Emma’s puking in the bathroom over there,” Lucy says, jabbing her thumb in the proper direction. “Paul, Tom, and Becky are downstairs with the professor.” 

“Where’s Ethan?” Ash asks, instinctively looking at Theo. They sigh, and point to the back door. 

“He’s been sitting out there for a few hours,” they say. “You should go talk to him. And take him something to eat, too. There are a few pop tarts left.”

Ash grabs a pack and slips out the back door, shivering in the cold. Ethan’s sitting on a bench, looking over toward a duck pond near the edge of the woods that come to the back of the property. He looks up when the door closes behind Ash, and scoots over to make room for her to sit with him. 

She silently offers him the pop tarts, but he shakes his head. Frowning, Ash tries to hide her shivers, but he notices anyway. Ethan takes the flannel off from around his waist and makes her put it on.

“Theo said you wanted to talk?” Ash asks softly, snuggling into his side. He wraps an arm around her, but doesn’t say anything just yet. Her words come with a puff of visible air. 

Finally, he sighs. “I don’t wanna make you feel pressured or anything,” he mumbles, and Ash quirks a brow.

“About what?” she asks.

“I--” Ethan hesitates again, glancing at her. His blue eyes dart down a little, looking to her lips, and Ash blushes as she realizes what he probably wants to say.

“Oh,” she says quietly, heart racing, but she doesn’t shy away. 

“You can say no,” he murmurs.

“What if I don’t want to say no?” She asks, voice barely more than a whisper.

Ethan kisses her, and she melts into it. He cups her face with his non-gloved hand, mouth molding to hers. When he finally pulls away, her lips feel even colder than they had before the kiss. She giggles quietly, laying her head on his shoulder.

“Is that something I can get used to?” Ethan asks, hugging her close. “Please?”

“I’d like that,” Ash whispers, pulling away from him to grin, then frowns when she notices something that makes her heart freeze. There’s something sticky, caught in Ethan’s hair near where Becky had bandaged it up before.

It’s blue.

_ Shit. _

Ash grabs a confused Ethan’s hand and drags him inside, shooting a panicked look to her friends, before taking him downstairs to the professor’s lab (which had been her grandfather’s workshop in the old world). 

“Something’s wrong with Ethan’s head wound,” she announces. 

Hidgens and Becky both come forward to inspect it, and Ash watches the professor carefully. Just as she’d known he would because of the group chat, his eyes widen when he recognizes the blue goop dotted along Ethan’s hairline. He quickly collects a sample, and shuts everyone out of the lab.

Hannah’s waiting in the hallway with fear in her eyes, and clings to Ethan. “Bad stuff,” she whispers as he picks her up. 

“It’s okay, Banana,” Ash tries to soothe.

“Not his second chance,” the girl insists, and Ash sighs.

“I know,” she says. “Let me talk to him, okay?” Hannah whimpers, but nods, so Ash sends everyone else back upstairs before knocking on the lab door.

“Professor Hidgens?” she calls out. “It’s Ash… um, Ashley Foster. We met earlier. I’m Hannah’s sister? I really need to talk to you about that blue shit.”

The door cracks open, and Ash goes in. The professor is eyeing her half-suspiciously, and she bites her lip. 

“It’s not what you think,” she says softly. “What that stuff means-- it’s not good.”

“You know what it is,” he accuses, and Ash nods.

“Yeah,” she mumbles. 

“You know what it will bring?”

Ash makes eye contact, frowning when she sees a flash of pain in his eyes, the same shade of blue as Ethan’s (go figure). “Better than you do, I can promise you that,” she says quietly but confidently.

She makes the mistake of turning her back on the professor for a brief moment, and only realizes it when she feels the tell-tale prick of a needle in the side of her neck.

“Oh, fu--”

The world goes black as she slumps into Hidgens’ arms.

  * ~<>~•



She’s woken by small hands shaking her shoulder some time later. Her eyes flutter open, and she sees Hannah’s worried face, lips drawn in a pout. Ethan’s standing behind Hannah, and then Ash feels the cold sting of antiseptic on the side of her head. 

Wincing, Ash cranes her neck to look. The professor is applying some ointment to her temple, and gives her a guilty look. 

“I’m so sorry,” he says quietly. “I— I’m afraid I lost myself, and you all paid the price for it.”

Ethan shoots the professor a slight glare, but neither says anything more. Hannah climbs up onto the metal table with Ash and curls into her side. Ash holds her close, still a little confused. Hidgens sighs and leaves the lab, and Hannah gets back up and follows after him. Ash slowly sits up, with Ethan’s help, and he sits next to her on the table. 

“So what happened?” Ash asks softly. She knows the answer, but she needs to at least act confused. 

Ethan tells her everything— how Hidgens, once knocking out Ash, had dispersed a gas sedative through the vents to put everyone else to sleep, wearing a gas mask to keep himself uneffected. He’d then dragged Ethan and a few others closest to the lab (Theo, Megs, and Hannah), and tied them all up in chairs next to Ash. Hannah, upon waking, managed to convince Hidgens to stop by informing him of something Webby told her. Ethan has no idea what it was, but at least he doesn’t disbelieve Webby’s existence anymore, not after what happened at the mall.

But he’s clearly leaving something out, and Ash frowns. She quirks a brow at him, and he gives in. 

“Um, we also found out that Hidgens used to date your dad,” Ethan mumbles. “Like, while he and your mom were still together. And Hidgens knew Ted was married...”

“Oh,” Ash says quietly, pretending to try to process the ‘news’. “Um... wow. That’s interesting...”

“Ash,” Ethan says gently, cupping her face in his hands. “They broke up around the same time that your dad left. Ted isn’t coming back. He can’t hurt you anymore— and neither can your mom.”

“I know,” Ash murmurs. 

Most of what Ethan just said is true, sure— Ted and Hidgens broke up, and Ted won’t hurt her. But she knows for a fact that he’ll come back, and that Maddie will get in one last jab before finally going away for good. 

She wonders vaguely if they can do something to speed up getting Ted to come, or if she has to wait for Hannah to run away while everyone else is fighting. Maybe Ash can be the one to run off instead.

Shaking herself out of her thoughts, she leans into Ethan. “So why does my head need taking care of, then?” she asks the professor, who has just come back, with Hannah still following him.

“You hit your head when I untied you,” Hidgens admits. “I was too slow to react, and wasn’t able to catch you quite in time.”

Ash nods slightly, glancing to Hannah and giving her a small reassuring smile. “How’re you feeling, Banana?” she asks.

“Better day,” the little girl says quietly, returning the smile. 

“That’s good,” Ash sighs, closing her eyes as she leans on Ethan again. She yawns. “What time is it?” she asks.

“Nearly ten PM,” Hidgens answers.

“Bedtime, Banana,” Ash says, but doesn’t yet move from Ethan’s shoulder. She whines in protest, but Ash won’t hear it, finally getting up. She sways on her feet, and Ethan makes her sit back down. 

“Will you put her down, Ethan?” she asks softly, and he glances at Hidgens.

“The last time I left you alone with  _ him _ \--”

“This won’t be like last time,” Ash assures him. “Please, babe?”

Ethan sighs, nodding, and scoops up Hannah. He takes her out of the lab and up the stairs, reluctantly leaving his girlfriend alone with the professor who had previously drugged her.

“I really am sorry,” Hidgens says quietly. “It won’t happen again, I swear.”

“I know,” Ash sighs, laying back down on the metal table and closing her eyes. “Hannah’s not the only one who knows things. I, uh… I was trying to warn you before. That the Hive isn’t good.”

“Yes, I realize that now,” Hidgens replies. “And… I’m assuming Ethan told you about my…  _ history _ with your father?”

Ash nods. “Yeah, he did. He doesn’t know what really happened when my dad left, though.” She bites her lip, opening her eyes again. “And neither do you.”

“I know what happened,” Hidgens scoffs. “No offense to you, but your father was an ass who dumped me via text.”

“There’s more to it than that,” she mumbles, remembering the desperation she’d felt to make sure Ted wasn’t actually a serial adulterer. She’d wanted to make him a good guy with the asshole exterior. She’d gone to  _ great _ lengths to avoid the whole ‘cheating’ thing.

Ethan comes back in just then, practically running in. He glances between the two already there, still looking at the professor in distrust, before scooping Ash up in a bridal-style hold and carrying her out. 

She doesn’t bother protesting, too tired from the sedatives still in her system.


	4. Chapter 4: Asshole Exterior

The more she thinks about it, the less she wants to wait. Ash doesn’t like the idea of Hannah running off on her own, especially given the state of the town post-Wiggly. 

She’s just decided to go find Ted herself, grabbing the car keys off the kitchen counter and putting them in her pocket, when she hears loud arguing. Going to investigate, Ash’s heart sinks when she realizes it’s Ethan and the professor…  _ again _ . They’re arguing about… Hannah’s safety?

“You tried to kill us all!” Ethan reminds Hidgens, who scoffs.

“I did  _ not _ ,” he replies. “I tried to induce the Apotheosis because I thought there was a difference.”

“There’s no difference,” Ethan snaps.

They keep going like this, and Ash groans softly and leans back against the wall, listening to them in exasperation. She closes her eyes, preparing to wait the argument out and talk to her boyfriend (which, even after three days of being here, is still weird to her) when he comes out of the locked room they’re in. A small scuffling sound, followed by a door slamming in the distance, snaps Ash back to attention. She hurries after the noise, momentarily forgetting about the argument behind her, and starts to panic as she sees a small figure running down the backyard toward the woods.

Hannah.

_ Fuck, I forgot about this part _ , Ash thinks, threading her fingers through her own hair and tugging. 

Someone gently touches her shoulder, and she whirls around to see Megs. “Hannah just ran off,” she says, panic edging into her voice. “Into the woods… Megs, we have to find her. It’s too cold out there, and she doesn’t have a coat—”

“Ashley, calm down,” Megs soothes. Ash tries not to flinch at the name. “Don’t you remember how this went down before? With Webby…?”

Ash turns back to look out the glass door, and sure enough there’s a tall figure following the much shorter Hannah. The tall one turns back toward the house for a moment, and she can practically feel its eyes looking right at her. A wave of calm rushes over her, and she shivers a little.

“Still,” she mutters, turning back to Megs. “Get the others and tell them where Hannah’s gone. I have something else I need to do.”

Megs follows her to the front door, where Ash grabs a spare coat from the closet and puts it on. “Where are you going?” she asks suspiciously. “I figured you’d be the first one out there to look for Hannah, but you’re running off in the opposite direction.”

“I’m going to find Ted,” Ash says quietly. “I can’t wait around for Hannah to run off and do it. She’s five, and the town’s still fucked up from Wiggly. And seeing her run off just now just cinches it, you know?”

“Ashley, if you change it, she might still run off,” Megs hisses. “But then she won’t have Ted to find her!” 

Ash can’t hold herself back this time, her breath catching in her throat, and Megs clearly notices. She pushes past it quickly, countering, “Or, she might not run off at all if I bring him here first.” She throws open the door. “Just— go tell Hidgens and Ethan about Hannah.”

She slams the door behind her, and heads to the car. Pulling the key out of her pocket, she starts it up and backs out of the driveway. 

Ash makes it about five minutes down the road when she realizes she has no idea where she’s going. It takes her another three to realize she recognizes the roads anyway. They’re the ones from her hometown.

  * ~<>~•



Hannah goes deeper and deeper into the woods, stumbling over tree roots. She’s cold, but she doesn’t care. Anything to get away from the yelling and fighting. It reminds her too much of her mommy, and of those people at the mall. She knows Ethan and Hidgens would never hurt her (or each other) like that, but it’s still scary.

The deeper she goes, the thicker the trees get and the darker it becomes. It’s starting to remind her of that scene from Snow White, after the huntsman lets her go and all the eyes are watching her.

But Hannah’s too stubborn to turn around.

She sits down on a rock, shivering. Movement catches her eye, and she looks up. There’s someone standing a little ways away, watching her carefully. They look like her daddy, but Hannah can tell it isn’t him. The air starts getting warmer around her, and her eyes start to feel heavy. Curling up on the rock, Hannah starts to fall asleep as the person comes closer.

They gently pick her up so they can sit on the rock, laying her in their lap. Hannah stops shivering as they play with her hair and start humming with her daddy’s voice.

She feels safe.

  * ~<>~•



Ash makes her way downtown, unsure how to feel about everything around her. The idea that Hatchetfield looks like her hometown, but with a few obvious changes, is slightly dizzying. The local Wal-Mart, for example, seems to have been replaced by… what looks like the remains of a burned-down mall. Cars are still scattered around the parking lot, from where their owners had perished in the fire— that Ash had apparently set, if she'd replaced Lex.

She makes a U-turn, forcing herself to not look back in the mirror at the ruins. 

At the top of a hill is main street, where the buildings look relatively the same as they had back home. The only differences here are the names of the businesses that occupy them. The town’s local coffee shop, owned and operated by Ash’s neighbors, has been replaced with Beanie’s. Looking further down the street, she can see a Starbucks logo, and drives toward it. 

She remembers the lines in the show about Starbucks being closer to the office than Beanie’s. 

Sure enough, block lettering— on the front of what should’ve been Ash’s favorite local diner— spells out “CCRP Tech”. She puts the car in park in the middle of the street and jumps out, running to the front door. Shoving against it, she groans when she remembers there’s a barricade on the other side.

“Dammit!” She cries out, trying one more time. 

Ash goes around the side of the building, squeezing down the small alley to try and find another entrance. There’s a back door, but it’s locked, so she heads back to the front. She tries banging on the window right next to the door, unable to see anything but her own desperate reflection in the fading light as the sun sets. Wiping tears from her eyes, Ash heads back to the car and sits in the driver’s seat to get out of the cold.

She lets herself cry for a few minutes, unsure why she’s so emotional about this. She’s technically never even  _ met _ Ted, but he’s apparently her father now. He’s  _ Hannah’s _ father, and Hannah is absolutely important to Ash.

Just as she calms down, a tap resounds on her window, and Ash jumps out of her skin.

  * ~<>~•



Henry trudges along through the snow alongside an equally-worried Ethan, following the footsteps heading toward the woods. Emma and Paul, Tom and Becky, Megs and Lucy and Cara, are all following along behind them to join the search.

The only ones staying behind are Tim— whose father declared him too young to go out and help— and Theo, who is staying to take care of him.

Once they reach the tree line, the footsteps disappear.

There’s less snow between the trees, and Henry sighs. The group splits off into pairs (and one group of three) to start combing the woods for the missing five year old.

Ethan and Hidgens end up paired together, much to their displeasure. The teen mutters something under his breath, that sounds suspiciously like blame to Henry, but he elects to ignore it for now. Arguing again won’t help them find Hannah. 

They traipse through the trees, stepping over rocks and roots. Henry clicks on his flashlight to help them see, and he can see the beams from the other pairs’ lights, as well, although they slowly disappear as the others move further and further away. 

Somewhere ahead of them, the professor can hear someone humming. The voice is familiar, but stops as Ethan and Henry approach. Henry’s heart sinks as he recognizes the back of this person, overshadowing the relief he feels at seeing Hannah in their lap, safe and sound. 

“Wha—“ Ethan’s bewildered exclamation is cut off by Henry’s vaguely angry one. 

“What the hell are you doing here, you ass?” He asks his ex. 

  * ~<>~•



Ash jumps, startled, and looks up. A familiar face with a crooked jaw and rather sleazy mustache is peering in at her— the exact face she’d come all this way to see. She opens the door and hops back out of the car, throwing herself into Ted’s arms for a hug as she sobs in relief. 

That relief is two-fold, actually. Part of it is the fact that it’s him and not an escaped Wiggly cultist. The other part is that she found him after all— or rather, he found her. 

He hugs her back, holding her tightly. 

“What are you doing here?” He asks, sounding scared. “Where’s Hannah? Where’s your mom?”

Ash’s shaking as she pulls away and wipes tears from her eyes. “Don’t know or care about Mom,” she says, voice breaking a little. “But Hannah’s— it’s a long story, but she’s safe… ish.”

“Ish?!” Ted repeats. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Like I said, it’s a long story,” she mumbles. “C’mon, get in the car. We gotta go, before one of  _ them _ shows up.”

Ted looks behind her and freezes. “Where did you get…?”

“You look like you already know,” Ash says softly. “Come on, Dad.”

He shakes his head. “I— I can’t,” he whispers. “He hates me. And even if he doesn’t, he  _ should _ .”

“Just trust me, please?” Ash begs. “Tell him what really happened, and he’ll understand. He still loves you, and I know you still love him.”

Ted looks like a deer caught in headlights. “Wh-what do you mean?” He asks shakily. “You  _ know _ ? How?”

“Um, it’s a long story…”

“You seem to have a lot of those,” he notes. 

“Not really,” she says, wincing. “More like one  _ really _ long one. It’s kind of all connected, really.”

Ted hugs her again, and she sinks into it. “I should’ve fought back,” he whispers into her hair. 

“You know why you couldn’t,” Ash whispers back. “Charlotte would have killed you.”

  * ~<>~•



The Ted-figure turns around, a finger to their lips. Henry immediately realizes his mistake— it’s not really Ted. The purple eyes are kind of a dead giveaway. They’re not the brown ones Henry fell in love with. 

“She’s asleep,” not-Ted says softly, standing up with Hannah in their arms. They pass her to Henry, and gently touches the bandages on Ethan’s head. Warmth spreads through the teen, and his brow furrows. 

“M-Mr. Foster?” Ethan asks, taking a step back. 

“No,” Henry corrects him, eyeing this person that looks like Ted, then says their real name. 

“Webby.”

  * ~<>~•



By the time Henry leads Ethan back to the house, Hannah’s starting to wake back up. “Daddy?” she mumbles, curling more into Henry. He holds her close. 

“No, sweetheart,” he says softly. “It’s me, Henry.”

“Oh,” she replies in a small, sleepy voice. “Will you be my daddy anyway?”

His heart flutters at the idea. Henry had always wanted a family, but his growing paranoia over the impending apocalypse had prevented him from doing anything to pursue that dream. He’d come very close twice before, once when he and Ted had talked about it, and once with another ex of his from much longer ago, but nothing had ever come of either. 

“I’d be honored, Hannah,” he says softly. “If you want me to be.”

She nods, closing her eyes again. “Family,” she mumbles, promptly falling asleep again. 

Henry carefully shifts her in his arms so he can open the back door of his house, and steps inside. 

“Oh, thank God!” a voice cries out. Ash rushes forward and gently takes her sister from Henry, and he hides a small disappointed frown as he lets her. 

“Ash, where’d you go?” Ethan asks, coming in behind Henry and going to hug her. 

“I— I had to run an errand,” she says, glancing nervously at Henry. “It was important… you’ll see in just a minute.”

“Did you know Hannah had run off?” Henry asks, and she nods sheepishly. 

“Yeah, but I also knew Webby would protect her, and that you guys would find her,” she says. “I  _ really _ needed to— well, um…”

“Peanut, I don’t know about this,” another new voice says, coming into the kitchen. 

Henry stares into the brown eyes of this newcomer in disbelief. Definitely not Webby this time. 

It’s really Ted. 


	5. Chapter 5: Coming Out

“Nobody start freaking out,” Ash warns. “I’m going to go put Hannah to bed, then the three of us are going to talk this out like the adults we are, right guys?”

Neither her dad nor the professor answer her, and she sighs. She goes and puts Hannah down in the front bedroom they’d been sharing since coming here, Ethan trailing behind her. 

“What the fuck is happening out there?” He hisses to her. “You went  _ looking _ for your dad? I thought you never wanted to see him again!”

“I—“ Ash takes a deep breath before giving him the excuse she’d come up with on her way out. “Webby told me what really happened, and it’s not his fault that he had to leave. Basically, the lady he left us for? She was blackmailing him the whole time.”

“Jesus,” Ethan mutters. “Why didn’t he, like, call the cops or something?”

“Her husband’s a cop,” Ash says quietly. “He’s a sergeant, actually. And he was in on the whole thing.”

Ethan hugs her, and she sinks into it. “So Hannah was right, then?” he asks. 

“Apparently,” she mumbles. With a sigh, she pulls away from the hug and kisses Ethan’s cheek. “I should go back out there… Do you wanna come with me, or stay with Hannah, or…?”

“I’ll stay with Hannah for now,” he says quietly. “You should let them work it out themselves, Ash.”

“I can’t,” she says, looking up at him with a small frown. “Or— at least let me check on them?”

Ethan sighs and kisses her forehead, and she blushes a little. Pulling away, she tries to clear her thoughts as she heads back down the hall toward the kitchen. She tries to psyche herself up for the probable mediation she’ll have to do for Henry and T— her dad. That’ll take some getting used to. It’s easier to think of him as ‘dad’ when she’s face to face with him, for some reason. 

She stops dead in her tracks when she reaches the entrance to the kitchen, and lets out a heavy sigh before clearing her throat loudly.

Henry and Ted spring apart, where they had been kissing heavily.

Ash quirks an eyebrow. “I figured I’d have to… I dunno, get you guys to talk first,” she says. “I can leave, if you want… although, try to keep in mind that there’s like, a dozen other people around here.”

“Ashley, uh—” Ted cuts himself off, blushing a little.

“You don’t have to explain anything,” she assures him, pursing her lips at the use of her birth name. “I get it. I have a boyfriend myself, remember?”

“Speaking of which,” Ted says, and Ash looks at him suspiciously. “I better not be getting any grandkids until you’re at  _ least _ twenty-one.”

Henry snorts a little. “Teddy…”

Ash blushes furiously. “I— I’m not—  _ we’re _ not—”

“Look, I don’t care what you guys get up to,” Ted continues. “I just want you guys to be safe about it, you know?”

“Dad,” Ash groans, running a hand over her face. She didn’t think she’d be having to have this conversation with Ted, especially in front of Henry. Oh, well. “Dad, I’m demisexual. I literally just had my first kiss like, two days ago. I’m definitely not ready for  _ sex _ any time soon.”

“Oh,” Ted says, blushing. Henry just chuckles.

“I’m just gonna… go, I guess,” Ash mumbles, taking a step back. “Promise me you’ll tell him what really happened?”

“Yeah,” Ted says softly, glancing at his somewhat ex-boyfriend. “I promise, Peanut. It’s getting pretty late, you should head to bed.”

“I’m going to,” she sighs. “I just need to talk to my friends first.” She heads back outside, where the others are just starting to come back from the woods. After letting them know that Hannah’s safe and sound, the adults head back inside, while the teens stay out with Ash for another minute.

“So?” Megs demands. 

“Ted’s here,” Ash tells them all. “Turns out Hatchetfield is laid out like my hometown, so I was able to find CCRP pretty easy. Anyway, uh, he should be telling Henry about everything with Charlotte right about now. I already caught them making out in the kitchen.”

“Gross,” Lucy says with a laugh. 

“So how are we gonna go about the whole… you know,  _ Beck _ thing?” Megs asks. “Like, getting Henry to put things together about Theo and Ethan?”

“And are we gonna try to find a way home or not?” Cara adds. “‘Cause I’d like to vote to stay, honestly.”

“Same,” Ash sighs. Lucy and Megs both agree as well. 

“I don’t have to worry about mocks anymore, thank God,” Lucy sighs.

“I’ll talk to Theo,” Cara volunteers, and heads back inside. Lucy yawns, and follows her lead. Megs stays behind, giving Ash a pointed look.

“What?” Ash asks, exasperated. 

“You  _ ran off _ ,” Megs says. “Why?”

“Because I didn’t want Hannah to do it,” Ash reminds her. “I told you that. If I brought Ted here, Hannah won’t have to run off to try and track him down herself.  _ And _ we get a head start on the whole wedding thing.”

“Or we just fucked everything up, and now we don’t know how everything else will be affected,” Megs counters. “Remember that other character we talked about bringing in? We were just about to do it when we came here. What if something happens to him now?”

“I’ll figure something out!” Ash hisses. “I’ll convince Ted to go before his landlord can call him, or I’ll go myself, or something.”

Megs sighs. “I’m just worried,” she says quietly, and Ash hugs her. 

“Me too,” she mumbles. “That’s why I want to get everyone here together as soon as possible.  _ Before _ all that drama we were plotting starts happening.”

They separate, and start heading back inside. “One more thing,” Megs says slowly. “Are you okay? You seemed really… upset about something earlier. Other than Hannah running off, I mean.”

Ash knows exactly what she’s talking about, and sighs. Her shoulders slump, making her seem smaller. “I… it’s nothing,” she mumbles. 

“It’s something, Ashley,” Megs says, and it clicks when Ash looks away at the sound of it. “Your name?”

“Just… Ash, please,” she says quietly. 

“Okay… mind if I ask why?”

“‘M not ready for that conversation.” Ash hesitates, but goes inside without another word. Megs bites her lip before following.

Ted and Henry are gone, and there’s no one left in the communal living areas. Ash goes to the front bedroom, where Hannah is still sleeping soundly. And Ethan is sitting at the keyboard, headphones plugged in, plunking away at the keys.

_ Plunking _ might be the wrong word… his fingers are far too delicate on them for that. It’s clear that he has some experience, that he knows what he’s doing. He’s playing something deliberately, not goofing around like Hannah had been before. Ash watches him quietly for a moment, before going over and wrapping her arms around him from behind.

Ethan jumps, startled, and stops playing. He turns his head to look at her, a slight blush dusting his cheeks, and he takes the headphones off.

“Don’t do that,” he grumbles.

“What, hug you?” Ash asks innocently, already starting to let go.

Grabbing her arms to keep them in place, Ethan rolls his eyes. “You know what I mean,” he says. 

“Oh,” Ash says, nodding. “Okay. Touching in general, then. I’m sorry, I guess I’ll just have to refrain from kissing you in the future…”

“Ash,” he whines.

“Ethan,” she whines back teasingly, before planting a kiss on his cheek. “There. Happy now?”

“Getting there,” he says with a smirk. “So how’d it go?”

Ash grimaces, remembering what happened when she’d first walked out there. “They were making out,” she admits. “I think they’re gonna be fine. Dad promised they’d actually talk about it. And  _ I _ promised I’d go to bed, so come on.”

“Oh, you want me to join you?” Ethan smirks again. “In  _ bed _ ?”

Ash gestures to the one behind her, where Hannah’s still fast asleep, and her boyfriend pretends to pout. He stands up from the keyboard bench and finally returns her hug, pressing a kiss to the top of Ash’s head. She pulls him over to the bed and lays down, dragging him down with her. Curling up behind her as she holds Hannah close, he buries his face in the crook of her neck and falls asleep.

As tired as she is, Ash doesn’t manage to sleep for a while yet. Her thoughts are running rampant as she thinks about everything Megs had said, worrying that maybe she  _ is _ going to fuck things up.

  * ~<>~•



The next morning, Theo wakes up extra early, and they’re not sure why. Heading out into the kitchen, they frown at the dire state of the pantry and fridge, and let out a sigh. They grab a coat from the closet by the front door, and almost get out the door before they’re stopped by someone.

“Where are you going?” Henry asks suspiciously, and Theo freezes.

“Um, you kinda don’t have any food,” they say quietly. “I was gonna go find some.”

“I highly doubt any grocery store will be open during the apocalypse,” Henry replies. Theo shrugs.

“I’ll break in and raid one if I have to,” they say. Henry chuckles.

“I have an entire storage room full of food downstairs,” he reveals. “I’m a survivalist, remember?”

“Then why the fuck-- never mind,” Theo mumbles, taking their coat back off and letting Henry lead them down towards his lab. The next door down the hall from it opens up into, indeed, an entire storage room full of MRE’s, non-perishable goods, and other doomsday supplies.

He lets Theo grab whatever they want, so they take some stuff to make pancakes upstairs. Henry follows.

“So, I’m not sure we’ve been properly introduced, Miss…?”

“Mx, actually,” Theo says. “They/them, too. I’m Theo, Ethan’s twin.”

“My apologies,” Henry says sheepishly. “I’m Henry, one of Emma’s professors, although I’m sure you already knew that…”

“Well, she did tell us about her doomsday survivalist biology professor, brought us to his house, and then you showed up, so…” Theo trails off. They remember something from the group chat suddenly, and their eyes widen a fraction. Henry doesn’t seem to notice, having taken over the pancake-making. They watch him quietly for a few minutes, wondering if they should say something or just stay quiet.

Just as they decide to say something, Ethan walks in with a sleepy Hannah in his arms. 

“Pancakes!” the five year old cheers, perking up a bit. “And they look like Daddy’s!”

“Did he give you the recipe when you were dating?” Ethan asks the professor, who shakes his head.

Theo bites their tongue and fights to keep a straight face, remembering where this conversation is going.

“Actually, I gave it to him,” Henry replies, ladling out a small batch for Hannah, who’s now frowning.

“He said his daddy gave it to him,” she says, and Henry blushes furiously. Theo and Ethan both wheeze with laughter. Emma looks mildly disgusted, while Hannah just looks confused.

“Um-- I, uh--” Henry tries to get out, but can’t form the words. Finally, he manages a small, “That doesn’t leave this room.”

Ethan sets Hannah down in a chair at the table, and goes to get her a glass of water. She pouts, thinking they’re laughing at her, and starts biting her nails. 

Theo sees the perfect opportunity to say what they were going to say before, when Ethan stands next to the professor.

“Wow,” they say, pretending to be surprised. “You guys look really similar, it’s spooky. Professor, you look more like his twin than  _ I _ do.”

The two guys glance at each other, considering it. Ethan snorts, but Henry looks thoughtful. Theo turns to Hannah, smirking to themself. The seed has been planted, which is good enough for now.

Ted comes up the stairs from the basement just as Henry sets a plate of pancakes down in front of Hannah, and smiles softly. Hannah doesn’t see him yet, but Theo does. They give him a half-wave, which Ted returns awkwardly, before going back to helping the little girl put tons of maple syrup on her plate. 

Ethan glances at Ted, and scowls a little. He doesn’t say anything, though.

Hannah takes a bite of pancake, getting syrup all over her chin, and looks up. Her eyes widen comically when she sees Ted, and she gasps. She drops her fork and jumps out of the chair, throwing herself into Ted’s arms and sobbing as he picks her up and holds her close.

“Daddy, you came back!” she cries, mouth still full of food. Syrup has now gotten all over Ted’s shirt, but he doesn’t care.

Tears pricking at his own eyes, Ted holds her tightly and mumbles apologies for ever leaving to begin with. “A bad lady made me leave, Pumpkin,” he says softly, voice breaking slightly. “She wouldn’t let me see you or your sister, no matter how much I wanted to. I’m so sorry…”

“Webby said,” Hannah mumbles, finally swallowing her pancake bite. “Not your fault. Mean cat lady.”

“Yeah, mean cat lady,” Ted can’t help but agree.

“She’s gone now?” Hannah asks, and Ted nods.

Theo hides their frown, knowing it’s not  _ quite _ true yet, and starts on their own plate of pancakes. Ethan glances at them in concern, but doesn’t say anything.

Hannah finally starts squirming, and Ted sets her down so she can go back to her breakfast. Henry beckons him over to talk quietly by the pantry.

“By the way, you should be aware of something,” Henry says quietly. “Yesterday, when we were bringing her back inside… well, um… Ted, your daughter calls me ‘daddy’ too, now. Completely different context from-- well.”

They both blush. “Right…” Ted mumbles. “Well, given what you know now, about the shit Charlotte made me say and do… is it out of the question to make it official?”

Henry blinks as his brain tries to process. “Teddy, are you… asking me to marry you?”

Ted nods, extremely nervous. “I mean, it doesn’t have to be any time soon, I know the timing’s kinda shit, but--”

Henry interrupts him with a passionate kiss.

Hannah, who can’t hear their conversation but can  _ see _ them, whines about them being gross. Theo and Ethan both snicker.

“Just eat your pancakes, Banana,” Ethan says, ruffling her hair, and she pouts. 

“Do you and Ash get all ‘gross’ like that, Ethan?” Theo teases, and he blushes.

“Shut up, Theo,” he grumbles, stealing a pancake right off their plate. They stick their tongue out at him. 

“She has a valid question, though,” Ted pipes up, coming over to sit next to his daughter.

Ethan holds up a finger, and scowls at Ted. Theo sighs. “First of all,” Ethan says, “my sibling is nonbinary, so if you misgender them again I’ll kick your ass. And second of all, what I do or don’t do with my girlfriend is no one’s business but ours.”

Ted holds his hands up in surrender. “Sorry,” he says to Theo, who shrugs. “And look, Ethan: Ashley is my  _ daughter _ , so it kind of  _ is _ my business. But as long as you don’t knock her up any time soon, we won’t have a problem. Capiche?”

Ethan blushes, and has no response to the statement except a small nod. Ted turns back to Henry.

“Right, so since I’m staying, I should probably try to swing by my apartment to get a change of clothes and stuff,” he says.

“Can you take us, too?” Ash asks from the doorway, rubbing sleep from her eyes. “Hannah and I can’t be wearing these clothes for the rest of the apocalypse.”

“Sure,” Ted says. “We can head out later today, Ashley.” 

Ash frowns slightly, and glances to Theo, who’s looking at her with concern. “What?” she asks them.

“You seem off,” Theo says. “Like… ever since we  _ got here _ .” 

“It’s just been stressful,” Ash defends. Ethan grabs her hand, giving it a small squeeze. 

“You know they’d understand,” he whispers. 

“ _ I’m _ still trying to understand it, Ethan,” Ash mumbles. Everyone else present looks between the two, confused. After a few quiet moments, Ash sighs and gives in… somewhat. “I’d like to just go by Ash, please,” she tells them. “I’ve been struggling with my gender for a few months now, and I’ve never really liked my birth name anyway, but just  _ Ash _ feels right.”

Ted smiles softly. It pushes a weight off of her shoulders, and she smiles back.

Theo’s already smiling. “So,  _ Ash _ … want some pancakes? They’re Henry’s recipe.”

Ethan snickers again, and Ash bites her lip, knowing  _ exactly _ what Theo means. She’s the one who’d come up with the joke in the first place.


	6. Chapter 6: Blood Sugar Bitch

After breakfast, Ted picks Hannah up and helps her clean her face, which has by now been covered in syrup. He slides back into the role of her father easily and gladly, determined to not fuck things up again. 

Sure, the last time hadn’t necessarily been his fault, but the next time could be— but he won’t let there  _ be _ a next time. He’s  _ very  _ determined. 

Ash seems to be on board, very confident in him, which Ted supposes is a good sign. She seems a lot more… grown up than the last time he’d seen her. Part of that, of course, is the fact that he hadn’t seen her since last Christmas. A year can really change a person. But there was something else about his daughter that Ted can’t put his finger on. She hadn’t been nearly this accepting of him at Christmas last year. 

And then there’s Hannah, who’s physically grown so much, and yet hadn’t seemed to change much at all. 

Leaving the bathroom with Hannah in his arms, Ted goes back to the kitchen. Ash’s waiting for them, leg bouncing as she sits in one of the chairs. She’s biting one of her nails, staring out the back door. 

Hannah reaches for her sister, tapping Ash’s shoulder. The teen jumps, startled, but getting up and taking Hannah from Ted’s arms. She follows Ted out to the car, holding Hannah in her lap as he drives. 

“Webby says Mommy left town,” Hannah whispers into Ash’s ear. “She left when the mall burned down…”

Ash smiles sadly down at her. “Maybe that means we can go home and get our stuff without seeing her, then?” Hannah nods. 

Ted drives them to their house first. Although “house” may be an exaggeration. It’s barely bigger than Ted’s own apartment, sitting on the edge of a trailer park. Hannah bounds out of the car, dragging Ash along. 

Ted hurries after them, and all three stop short when they see the front door sitting wide open. He goes in first, looking around suspiciously. The main living space— basically just a kitchen with a couch and a small TV— is absolutely trashed. Ash carries Hannah in after a moment, looking around with wide eyes. She sniffs, and wrinkles her nose. 

“Bad smell,” Hannah mumbles, doing the same thing. 

“It smells like— like cat pee,” Ash says, glancing at Ted, who nods. 

He sighs deeply. “She must’ve come here looking for me,” he mutters. “I’m sorry, girls. We should check the rest of the house.”

Ash nods, and carries Hannah back to their shared room. Some things are thrown around, but it looks like the room’s barely been touched. Hannah squirms out of Ash’s arms and goes over to her bed, covered in lavender bed sheets. Ash’s has a darker shade of purple. Both girls check under their beds, and pull out backpacks. 

Ash opens hers, rifling through. “I think everything’s still there,” she mumbles, standing up again. Ted quirks an eyebrow, and she glances at him. “Um— long story.”

“Let me guess, part of that other one?” He asks, and she nods. 

Hannah comes back over and takes Ted’s hand, her backpack slung over her shoulders like she’s going to school. “California,” she says simply, and Ash sighs. 

“Ethan and I… we were gonna run away,” she admits. “Take Hannah with us, of course. We were gonna go to California together. Then the whole… Black Friday thing happened.”

Ted wraps them both in a tight hug. “I am so sorry I wasn’t there for you two,” he says softly. “I should’ve been. I should’ve taken you with me, or something. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, Dad,” Ash mumbles, pulling back. “Come on, we should head to your place. I wanna get back to Hidgens’ house sooner rather than later.”

“Home,” Hannah corrects, and Ash smiles softly at her. 

“Yeah, it’s home now,” she says. There’s something in her eyes, but Ted can’t tell what it is. Whatever it is, it’s dark and sad. 

They head back out to the car, and he drives them to his apartment. He groans when they get up to the third floor and the door is wide open, just like his ex-wife’s house. 

When they get inside, however, it doesn’t seem to be all that disturbed. The few picture frames Ted had on the walls are gone, and there’s a pile of broken glass and frames in one corner of the kitchen, and there’s a stack of photos on the counter. Closer inspection reveals that they’ve been torn up and taped back together. 

There’s a thud from the bedroom, and Ted gestures for the girls to stay put before going to investigate. 

The room seems empty, but Ted can see the small rustle of the bedskirt, indicating someone had just moved it. Panic creeps up on him— that’s where Ted keeps the little fireproof safe with all the important documents and keepsakes. Copies of his, Ash’s, and Hannah’s birth certificates are all in there. His passport. A few other things. He approaches the bed and crouches down, moving the bedskirt up to peek under. 

There’s a teenage boy hiding under there, shaking with fear in his eyes. 

Ted sighs, and beckons for him to come out. The kid does, slowly and carefully. 

“Please don’t hurt me,” he mumbles, crawling out from the other side of the bed. Ted grabs the fire safe before getting back up. 

“I’m not gonna hurt you— what are you even doing here?” Ted asks, vaguely recognizing the kid. “Don’t you live above me?”

He nods. “M-my moms… they d-died on Friday,” the kid mumbles, hugging himself. “K-killed each other ‘cause of th-that Wiggly doll.”

“So you’ve been hiding in  _ my  _ apartment instead?” Ted asks. 

“They’re still up there,” the kid whispers, squeezing his eyes shut. Ted sighs. 

“Well, I’m not gonna just leave you here,” he says. “Come on. There’s a whole bunch of us staying somewhere else. My daughters are out in the living room. You can come home with us, there’s plenty of room.”

“I d-didn’t wreck your apartment,” the kid says timidly. “It was like this when I got here— I tried to fix your photos. You’re Ash’s dad, right? I recognized her in the pictures. We went to school together.”

“Yeah,” Ted says. “I know exactly who destroyed everything, don’t worry. Let me pack a bag real quick and we can head out of here. What’s your name again?”

“Peter,” he replies quietly, and glances to Ted’s closet. “Um… I don’t think there’s anything left to pack. All the clothes were cut to shreds when I got here…”

“Of course they were, that bitch,” Ted sighs. “Okay. Let’s just go, then.”

He leads Peter back out to the living room, where Ash and Hannah are going through the stack of taped up photos. They both look up at the same time, and Hannah shies into her sister, hiding her face in Ash’s shoulder. 

Ash rubs her back, giving Peter a timid smile. He returns it, and Ted claps a hand to his shoulder, holding the fire safe under his other arm. “Alright, Charlotte destroyed the rest of my stuff, so this is all I’ve got,” he tells the girls. “I’ll just have to borrow Henry’s clothes for a while until the world starts sorting itself out enough for me to go shopping.”

Ash frowns slightly, shifting Hannah to her other hip. “Is Peter coming with us?” She asks, and Ted nods. Peter gives her an inquisitive look. 

“I didn’t think you knew my name,” he admits quietly. “We only had a couple classes together before you— um, before you left.”

Ash shrugs, avoiding eye contact. “Let’s go home,” she says softly. 

  * ~<>~•



Ash holds Hannah securely in her lap on the drive home, feeling guilty. Ted’s apartment— and hers and Hannah’s house, she supposes— had been that way because of  _ her _ . Because  _ Ash _ had written that into the group chat. And Charlotte— the character who, in canon, may have some flaws but was overall a sweet and kind person— was a total monster because Ash was so desperate to avoid the “cheating asshole” characterization for Ted.

She’s not quite sure how to feel about it now.

She wonders if certain things that hadn’t been written into the chat yet would still come true— Peter squatting at Ted’s apartment certainly had. That would mean, based on the timeline she and Megs had plotted out, that her and Hannah’s mom was due to make an appearance sometime soon. Although that was supposed to be after the wedding, so…

Ash closes her eyes, leaning her head back. 

Hannah pulls a small stuffed animal out of her backpack, holding it tight to her chest. Ash rubs her back, and Peter squirms in the backseat.

When Ted pulls into the driveway, he tells them to wait so he can go warn Henry about Peter. Hannah insists on going with him, so Ash stays behind to wait with Peter. They sit in an awkward silence.

In her head, Ash is freaking out a little over the fact there were basically now  _ three _ Robert Manion’s in the house with them. Two of which were her age. Peter is a bit strange— he looks like Robert, just like Ethan does, but there’s something slightly off, more like he could be Robert’s cousin or something. 

She tries to shrug it off, shaking her head slightly to clear it. This could get real awkward real fast if she isn’t careful. Before the character of Ethan Green came along in  _ Black Friday _ , Ash had had a  _ huge _ crush on the Hot Chocolate Kid from  _ The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals _ . 

Ted comes back out to the garage and leads the pair inside. Ash heads straight to find Ethan, bumping into Megs. 

“I didn’t do it,” Ash tells her quietly. “I didn’t have to say anything. Ted decided to go, and I just asked to go with him.”

“Was he there?” Megs asks curiously, and Ash nods. 

“Same backstory as we talked about,” she says softly. Megs frowns, feeling bad. They’d been a little harsh with it. Then her eyes widen. 

“Oh, shit…” she mumbles. “Um, Cara and I were gonna tell you… we were thinking about getting Peter in a poly relationship with Lex and Ethan.”

“I— what?!” Ash squeaks, blushing. 

“Which means that if you’ve replaced Lex,” Megs continued, “and everything we’ve planned without actually doing is coming true… you may have a second boyfriend coming your way. If you want him.”

“I— I need to think about it,” Ash whispers, rushing off again. 

Ethan’s sitting in the living room with Theo, who has apparently convinced him to let them put little braids in his hair— no, wait. Ethan’s asleep. That explains it. 

“Peter’s here,” Ash says softly. “Um, his moms died and he was squatting in T— in my dad’s apartment.”

“Oof,” Theo says, frowning. “Is that something you and Megs…?”

“And Cara,” Ash mumbles. She glances to the sleeping Ethan. “Um… there’s more, but I can’t say here.”

“Should I go ask one of them?” Theo asks with a sigh, and Ash shrugs. 

“You can,” she says. “I think I just need to lay down for a bit. Do you mind if I borrow Ethan?”

“He’s all yours,” Theo says, carefully moving Ethan’s head out of their lap and getting up. They leave, and Ash goes over to the couch and curls up with her boyfriend. 

She nuzzles into his arms, sighing deep. 

Sure, Cara and Megs had planned a consensual polyamorous relationship for their three characters, but what if something goes wrong now that it’s their  _ life _ and not just a role play? What if Ethan and Peter decide they like each other more than they like Ash?

What if Peter doesn’t even like her to begin with, and Ethan has to choose between them… what if he chooses Peter?

Ash isn’t sure she could handle that at this point. So much has happened the last few days, and she’s finally starting to find some happiness. How could she ever cope with it being ripped away from her?

No. 

She has to calm down. She has to believe that, if they had planned for things to go smoothly, that everyone will be happy together. She has to believe things will work out. 

So far they have, so what’s to say they won’t continue to?

Try telling Ash’s anxiety disorder that. 

  * ~<>~•



After Ash runs off, Megs heads to the basement. There’s a room down there with nothing but a piano and a couch, and she’s itching to play. 

Taking a seat at the bench, Megs plays a little warm up, running her fingers along the keys just like she has hundreds of times before. It feels almost like home to her, and she sighs contentedly. 

_ God, we really fucked up these people’s lives,  _ she thinks, starting to play a show tune she’s recently been practicing a lot.  _ And now we have to live with those choices we made. It’s not so bad, though. We’ve known they’ll get a happy ending eventually, even if we like to stir up some drama sometimes. _

_ We’ll all get happy endings here.  _


	7. Chapter 7: Old Plans

Ethan isn’t really sure what to make of this new kid, even with four days to try to figure it out. They’d recognized each other from school, from before Ethan had dropped out. Peter seemed nice enough— maybe a little too nice toward Ash, but whatever. Hannah absolutely adores Peter already, the pair were even watching Disney movies together at this very moment. Since Peter had arrived, Hannah had barely glanced at Ethan, which was pretty disheartening. 

In turn, Ethan’s been spending a lot more time with Tim up in the front bedroom, sitting at the piano. Ethan’s been trying to teach the six year old how to play, but the kid’s attention span is more suited to coloring pictures and listening to Ethan play, than trying to play himself. Sometimes Theo will join them, sometimes their friend Megs, sometimes Ash. 

Another odd thing that’s been happening is Hidgens, lurking around sometimes. Ethan’s half worried he’s planning something again, but he also knows he wouldn’t dare, not with Hannah, Ash, and now  _ Ted _ around.

The door creaks open, and the professor himself peeks his head in. Ethan’s playing a little tune he wrote himself a while back, and Tim is quietly coloring something that Theo had drawn for him. 

“Ethan, might I have a word?” Hidgens asks quietly, and Ethan stops playing. 

“Go for it,” Ethan deadpans. 

Hidgens glances at Tim, then back to Ethan. “In private,” he clarifies. “You… and Theo.”

Ethan quirks a brow, but gets up nonetheless and follows the professor. Theo’s already waiting in the hall, hands in their pockets, and both twins follow down to the lab. Hidgens hands them each something that looks like a long Q-Tip, and Ethan stares at him.

“What the fuck is this?” he asks.

“Theo said something a few days ago that got me thinking.” Hidgens takes a deep sigh. “I knew someone a long time ago, a woman named Beckett Green. Is that name familiar?”

“Our mom,” Theo confirms. “She died almost three years ago.”

“Your—” Hidgens sighs again, looking resigned to something. “I was… I suspected that was the case. Would you two mind doing me a favor?”

“You think you’re our dad,” Theo says evenly. It’s clearly not a question. Hidgens nods.

“You two are about the right age for it to be possible,” Hidgens admits. “And you said it yourself— Ethan looks just like me.”

“And now you want to do a DNA test to prove it.” Another nod. Theo shrugs, and swabs the inside of their cheek.

“Why both of us, though?” Ethan asks, reluctantly following his twin’s lead. “We basically have the same DNA, right? Isn’t that how that works?”

“I want to run the tests twice, to be absolutely certain,” Hidgens says. “Better to be safe than sorry.” He takes the two swabs from them and turns around, doing something that the twins can’t see from where they are. Pulling out another swab, he does himself and adds it to the machine he’s using.

“How long is this gonna take?” Ethan asks, shifting his weight nervously from one foot to the other. Theo plays with one of the blue streaks in their hair, looking more curious than nervous.

“A few days.” Hidgens sighs. “You two can go back to what you were doing. I’ll let you know as soon as I get the results.”

Ethan heads back up to the bedroom, where Tim hasn’t moved. His mind is in a fog as he sits back down at the keyboard. He and Theo had never known their father. All they’d had was their mom, and their stepdad for a while. Ken had been cool, until he’d left for another woman. That was one of the things that Ethan and Ash had in common, back when they first started dating. He’d been able to comfort her about it.

A small cracking noise breaks Ethan out of his thoughts, and he looks over to Tim, who’s managed to somehow  _ break  _ the sharpie he’d been coloring with. Ink is spilling everywhere. Ethan groans a little. 

“How in the hell—” he mutters, before getting up to find some rubbing alcohol and paper towels. 

  * ~<>~•



Ash falls asleep on the couch, her head in Ted’s lap as he plays with her hair, and dreams of her old life. Except… it’s like she never existed. She wanders around her house, totally invisible. Her old bedroom is brown and gray, instead of the bright turquoise it should have been, and it’s decorated like a guest bedroom. Like no one ever lived in it permanently. 

Her brother and parents don’t notice she’s missing from their lives, they don’t notice when she stands in front of them and tries to get their attention. Ash runs out the front door, seeing her car is gone from the driveway. She goes back inside, scouring every picture frame in every corner of the house. 

She’s in none of them.

She doesn’t exist.

She never did.

Ash wakes up in a cold sweat, Ted already trying to soothe her. 

“It was just a dream, Peanut,” he murmurs as she sits up and clings to him. The memory of the dream sticks out, more vivid than any she’s ever had before. Deep down, she knows it wasn’t a normal dream. “What was it about? You wanna talk about it?”

Ash shakes her head, unable to even begin to try forming the words to describe the way she felt. The terror wasn’t coming from the idea that no one back home remembers her… it was from the fact that she didn’t  _ care _ that they didn’t. From feeling like she  _ should _ be sad or scared.

Just as she opens her mouth to assure him that she’s fine, a shout echoes from down the hall. Emma’s freaking out about something, and it sounds like Paul is, too. It’s a sufficient distraction for both Ted and Ash, and they go to investigate what’s happening. 

Paul’s standing outside the bathroom, Emma on the other side of the open doorway. Lucy’s standing down the hall, watching somewhat nervously. Ash looks to her, eyebrows slightly raised in a silent question, and Lucy nods. 

“But we were so careful!” Paul says. 

“Sometimes that’s not enough, Paul,” Emma says, clearly frustrated. 

“What’s going on?” Ted asks. 

“Fuck off, Ted,” Emma snaps. “Not now.” Ted raises his hands defensively. 

Paul is less frustrated than Emma, and quietly says, “She thinks she might be pregnant.”

“Um… congrats?” Ted says, unsure if it’s the right thing to say. It clearly isn’t, because Emma slams the bathroom door closed in their faces. 

Paul sighs, and knocks on the door. 

Ted leads Ash (and Lucy) back to the living room to give them some privacy. Hannah comes in after a minute, dragging Peter behind her. 

Peter smiles shyly at Ash, and she returns it before leaving again to find Ethan— mostly just to hide her blush. 

  * ~<>~•



The next morning, Ash wakes up alone. Slipping out of bed, she heads to the bathroom before going to get some breakfast. Peter and Ethan are sitting at the table, eating silently. Ash’s tempted to back out silently, before either can see her, but it’s too late. Her boyfriend looks up and beckons her over, kissing her cheek when she sits down in the chair next to his. 

He offers her a bite of his pop tarts, but she declines with a small shake of her head. Ethan gives her a worried look. 

“I— it’s nothing,” she mumbles. “Just not hungry…” It’s a half lie. She  _ had _ been pretty hungry when she’d gotten up, but now she’s lost her appetite. 

“You sure?” Ethan asks. “I could fix you something else. Waffles? Or— uh, maybe…”

“It’s okay, Ethan,” Ash says softly. “I’m really just not hungry yet.” She kisses his cheek, then glances over at Peter and blushes. 

He’s blushing, too, not looking at either of them. Ethan clears his throat, staring down at his pop tarts sullenly. 

“So where’s Hannah?” Ash asks, looking around. “I figured she’d be out here with one of you guys.”

Ethan shrugs, breaking up his food with his fingers. Peter looks around, too. 

“I saw her heading down to the basement earlier,” he says. 

“She probably went to Dad and Henry’s room, then,” Ash says with a sigh. “She’s been having bad dreams lately. They’ve been the only ones who can calm her down when she wakes up…”

Ethan frowns, glancing over to the stairs to the basement. Ash gets up and goes down them, peeking her head into the bedroom at the bottom. The only one there is Ted, so she heads down the hall to look elsewhere. Ethan follows her quietly. 

Henry and Hannah are in the room to the side of the lab, the one with the real piano. He’s teaching her how to play, and she’s soaking it up. They don’t notice the teens in the doorway, too absorbed in the piano lesson. Ash smiles, before backing away and leaving them be.

With a small smirk, Ethan grabs her hand and pulls her up the stairs and out the back door. They pass right by Peter, who has now been joined by Lucy, Megs, and Paul at the table. He takes her outside, and pulls her to sit with him on the bench from that first day. She laughs quietly, curling into his side. 

“What’s this about?” she asks teasingly, as Ethan wraps his arms around her.

“Just wanted some alone time with my girlfriend, that’s all,” he replies innocently, and kisses the top of her head.

“You’re up to something, Green,” she accuses, but he just shrugs, pulling her closer.

“I’m always up to something, Foster,” he says, smirking again. “It’s one of the  _ many _ things you love about me.”

She giggles. “You sure about that?”

Pretending to pout, Ethan retracts his arms from around her and goes to stand up. Her giggles turn to full laughter as she pulls him back.

“Oh, come on, E,” she says. “You know I love you… I’m just teasing. You make it so easy to do…”

“Don’t throw my words back at me,” he grumbles playfully, but relaxes again. Ash lays her head on his shoulder and sighs.

“I really do love you,” she murmurs, and he starts playing with her hair. He whispers it back.

_ Holy shit, I’ve been here less than a week and I already  _ _ mean _ _ that, _ she thinks to herself.  _ What is Hatchetfield doing to me? It took me six months to tell-- don’t think about him. He was an asshole, and not the lovable kind like Ethan. _

Meanwhile, Ethan is staring at the door, lost in thought himself. There was just something about Peter that Ethan couldn’t get his mind off of...

  * ~<>~•



Megs sits at the piano again that evening, playing a soft melody from a musical she’d been co-writing before this whole mess started. She wonders vaguely if she could remember enough of it off the top of her head to re-write it in this world. She hopes so-- she was so excited about it…

The song ends, and she stops singing, the last note trailing off into a sigh. If there’s one thing about the old world that she misses, it’s  _ Orbit _ . 

“That was beautiful,” someone comments, and Megs jumps, spinning around on the bench to look. It’s Henry Hidgens, and Megs blushes. “What was that from? I don’t recognize it, and I’m pretty familiar with most musicals.”

“Oh, um-- I wrote it myself,” she mumbles. “Me and a friend from school…”

Henry goes over and sits on the couch, giving her his full attention as she explains the plot. It’s pretty complicated, but he easily follows along. He grins as she finishes.

“That sounds like a show I’d very much like to see,” he says, and Megs blushes again.

“Really?” she asks. Henry nods. “Well, I’m still working on the music-- that’s only the third song I have, and there are still at  _ least _ a dozen more.”

“Perhaps I could help you, if you want,” he offers. “I… have some composition experience, myself.”

Megs’ eyes widen-- she knew he did, but the fact he’s offering to help her with  _ her _ show?!  _ Holy shit. _ She nods. “Can I hear some of your stuff that you’ve already written?”

“Of course,” he says, and Megs swaps seats with him so he can have plenty of room to sit and play the piano himself. “Now this is the title number of a show I’ve been writing myself. It’s called  _ Workin’ Boys _ …”


	8. Chapter 8: Friendship Bracelets

Lucy sits on the floor of the living room with Hannah and Ash, teaching them what may be the most valuable skill they could ever learn: the art of making friendship bracelets. 

They’d gotten string from the closet of the music room down in the basement, which was full of all kinds of artsy supplies. Most were things you might find in the closet of a costume designer, including lots and lots of embroidery floss, in every imaginable color. Hannah is making one out of turquoise and tan string, and doing a very good job for a five year old. Ash’s is two shades of purple, and Lucy’s is pink and purple.

Hannah smiles as she shows off the finished product, handing it to Ash, who smiles and holds out her wrist.

“You gotta put it on me, Banana,” she says. “It’s one of the rules.”

“Rules?” Hannah asks, cocking her head. Ash nods.

“There are lots of rules about friendship bracelets,” she says. “Lucy already told you about one of them, right? Where the colors have to remind you of something important?”

“Beach,” Hannah says, nodding, holding up the bracelet again. “California.”

“And now that it’s done,” Ash says, “you have to tie it on my wrist for me. Once it’s on, I’m not allowed to take it off unless I’m taking a bath, or washing the dishes, stuff like that.”

“Dry,” Hannah says, nodding.

“Exactly,” Lucy says, finishing up hers. “I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go give this to Emma.” She scrambles to her feet and dashes off. Ash chuckles, and holds her wrist out for Hannah again. The five year old sloppily ties the bracelet on, and Ash does her best to help with her free hand.

“Now when I’m done with mine, I’ll put it on your wrist,” Ash says softly, going back to the bracelet she’s almost finished making. Hannah picks out some more colors, and gets to work on another bracelet.

She chooses yellow, brown, white, and pink, weaving them together in a chevron pattern that Lucy had shown Ash how to make. The one Hannah had made for Ash had the spiral of knots, alternating in the two colors. 

“Who’s that one for?” Ash asks, glancing over. Hannah just makes a kissy face at her in response. “For Ethan?” Hannah nods.

“Banana Split,” she mumbles, then sticks her tongue out in concentration.

“I see it,” Ash chuckles. “He’s gonna love it. Is today a good day, or a bad day?”

“Good day,” she mumbles, and starts humming a familiar tune. Ash bites her lip from singing along. It’s  _ Show Stoppin’ Number _ .

“Now, I  _ know  _ I haven’t taught you that one yet, princess,” Henry says from the doorway, watching the two sisters with a smile on his face.

“She just knows things sometimes,” Ash says, laughing. “Remember? Just like I do?”

“Yes, and your friend Megs,” Henry says, and Ash tilts her head.

“Right…” she trails off. “Um, love that song, by the way. Very catchy.”

“Thank you, it’s among my favorites that I’ve written,” Henry chuckles.

“I’d love to hear the full show sometime,” Ash says. “But first…” She turns back to Hannah. “Arm out, Banana.”

Hannah complies, and Ash ties the purple bracelet onto the girl’s small wrist. “Like our bedroom back at Mom’s house,” she says softly. “What do you think?”

Hanah smiles down at it, fiddling with the ends of the knot. “Very good day,” she whispers, then goes back to finishing the Banana Split bracelet. When she’s done, she picks out some more colors and starts making another one.

Ash watches her for a moment, just smiling. Then her stomach growls, so she gets to her feet and heads to the kitchen. Henry stays behind, sitting on the floor with Hannah and picking out a few colors himself.

Given her short stature, Ash has to drag a chair over from the table in order to reach the upper shelves of the pantry. The one she’d grabbed just so happened to be wobbly, go figure. She tries to keep her balance with one hand braced against the brick wall, reaching with the other. Even with the chair, she has to stand on the balls of her feet to reach the back of the shelf, where  _ someone _ had thought it would be a good idea to hide the peanut butter.

“Need a hand?” Someone asks from behind her, and Ash jumps, sock slipping on the wooden chair. She falls back, but luckily the person who’d spoken is able to catch her.

Ash blushes as Peter sets her back on her feet. “Um, thanks,” she mumbles, holding the jar of peanut butter to her chest. “I got it, though…”

“Why was that on the top shelf, anyway?” Peter asks, putting the chair away for her. Ash can see a tinge of pink on his cheeks, which only serves to worsen her own blush. She can feel them heat up.

“Ethan likes to hide it from me,” she says, setting the jar on the counter. “He thinks it’s funny to watch me look for it. He put it on top of the cabinets yesterday, above the fridge. Not  _ in _ the cabinet,  _ on top _ of it.”

“Well the pantry’s kind of a let down after that,” Peter says with a small smirk.

Ash shrugs, face finally cooling down. “Don’t let him hear you say that,” she warns. “If he hides it somewhere worse, you’re the one I’m coming for.”

Peter chuckles a little, and heads toward the living room where Hannah and Henry are.

Ash spoons out some peanut butter before twisting the cap back on and sticking the jar on a more reasonable shelf in the pantry. She heads down the hall, looking for Ethan. He’s in the bathroom with Theo, just starting to help them rinse out their hair over the edge of the bathtub. The water’s running a deep, dark purple. 

“Hey,” Ash says, and Ethan grins up at her.

“We found hair dye in that theatre closet downstairs,” Theo says, forehead resting against the inside of the tub, as Ethan uses the detachable shower head to rinse their hair.

“Sounds fun,” Ash says, grinning. There are two different bottles sitting on the counter-- one blue, one purple. “Is there enough for me?”

“There’s plenty,” Ethan says. “We can do yours next, if you want.”

“We can match!” Theo adds. 

“Maybe later.” Ash laughs. “I’ll do this, E. Hannah has something for you. You might wanna wash your hands first, though.”

Ethan chuckles, carefully passing his girlfriend the shower head before stepping back and washing his hands thoroughly in the sink. He dries them off, and leaves the bathroom.

Ash helps Theo rinse their hair until the water runs clear, humming softly. 

“So, I’ve been talking to Ethan,” Theo says. “And you should be aware that he’s feeling guilty over  _ something _ , but he won’t tell me what it is.”

“Oh, lord,” Ash sighs. “Any ideas?”

“I don’t think it’s something he’s  _ done _ ,” Theo says, turning off the shower. “More like something he’s thought about, or something like that, you know? I keep catching him zoned out, and he always snaps back in looking like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar.”

Ash thinks about it for a few moments, grabbing an old gray towel to help pat Theo’s hair dry. “Could be… oh, God,” Ash mumbles, blushing. “Do you think he’s-- I dunno, like… thinking about sex?”

Theo groans. “God, I hope not,” they say. “He’s my brother, remember? I don’t wanna think about that shit in  _ general _ , let alone involving  _ him _ .”

“But why would he feel bad about that…?” Ash mumbles, more to herself than to her friend. “He’s a teenage guy, it’s normal to think about that…”

“I mean, he knows how important your boundaries are to you,” Theo points out, sighing. They take over with the towel, twisting their hair up in it until the whole thing resembles a mohawk. “He’d probably feel like even fantasizing about sex is breaking them.”

Ash blushes, looking down at her hands. “I mean…”

“I don’t wanna know,” Theo says immediately. “You know I love you, but I’m gonna need you to have this conversation with  _ literally _ anyone else but me. Bye!” They don’t actually make any effort to leave, though, and Ash snickers to herself.

“Don’t be so dramatic,” Ash teases.

“Can’t help it, it runs in my blood,” Theo says. “Seriously-- did Cara or Megs tell you what we’d planned?”

“The thing with Henry, you, and Ethan?” Ash asks, nodding. “Yeah. Megs also told me about something else the two of them had been planning…”

“Is it the thing you couldn’t tell me the other day?” Theo asks knowingly, and Ash nods again. “Cara told me about it. How do you feel about… that?”

She sighs, grabbing the bottle of purple hair dye and fiddling with it. She bites her lip. “I mean… I’ve always said I’d support my friends in those kinds of relationships. I’m not opposed to them in theory, but… I know myself. I know how most people see me, too.”

Theo looks at her, confused. “What do you mean?”

Ash gives them a tired look in return, resigned to the facts she’s about to say. “I’m not exactly a catch,” she mumbles. “And I get insecure really easily, too. My biggest concern in actually being in a polyamorous relationship is always feeling like a third wheel to my own partners. I know it can get pretty irrational, but I just-- I don’t want to put that on them, you know? They shouldn’t have to face my demons for me.”

Theo twists their necklace between their fingers, sighing. “If they really love you-- which I can tell Ethan does, no question about it-- then they won’t care how many of your demons they have to face,” they say. “You’d face plenty for them, right?”

Ash nods quietly, biting her lip. 

“Then trust that they’d gladly do the same for you,” Theo says softly. “At the end of the day, though, you need to follow your heart and do what you think is best for  _ you _ . If you have to stray from the R.P. again, then so be it.”

“Thanks,” Ash mumbles.

“Sorry,” Theo says, wincing. “I’m kinda shit at relationship advice.”

“No--” Ash says, shaking her head as she sets the dye bottle down again. “That was actually really good. Thank you, seriously.”

“Oh, well, you’re welcome,” Theo says with a sly grin. “Want me to dye your hair, then?”

“Maybe later,” she sighs. “I should go talk to Ethan…”

Still, Ash doesn’t try to get up. She’s sitting on the edge of the bathtub, staring down at her stained hands. There are splotches of both purple and blue on them, and she bites her lip again. 

“Is there something else wrong, or are you just… procrastinating?” Theo asks.

“What if… so, Peter was supposed to like both Ethan and Lex, right?” Ash asks in response. “But now instead of Lex, it’s me… what if he doesn’t like me? I’m nothing like Lex. I don’t smoke, I don’t drink. I’m just  _ me _ .”

“First of all,” Theo says, “that boy clearly has a crush on you, just as you are. And second, I’d take you over canon Lex any day. Don’t get me wrong, Angela’s gorgeous, but, like--” They cut off, shrugging.

“You’re sure?” Ash asks softly. “About Peter?”

Theo nods. “As positive as I am about how much Ethan loves you.”

Ash sighs one more time, and finally stands. “Thanks, Mo,” she says, heading out of the bathroom. 

She can hear Ethan’s voice coming from further up the hall, from the front bedroom with the keyboard, and heads toward it. She can’t make out what’s being said, exactly, but the door’s cracked open. Reaching out, she pushes it open further, poking her head in, and freezes at the scene before her.

Ethan’s leaning in toward Peter, and kisses him as Ash stands there and watches. Peter kisses him back.

“What the  _ fuck _ ?”

The two boys spring apart, looking to her in the doorway with horrified, guilty looks on their faces.

Tears well up in Ash’s eyes, and Ethan stands up, reaching for her. She shakes her head in disbelief.

Ethan’s just  _ kissed _ Peter. Without talking to her about it first. He’s just cheated on her.

_ Oh, fuck. _


	9. Chapter 9: Truth of the Matter

Ash’s breath hitches, and she stumbles back before turning and running down the hall and out the back door. She can hear Ethan running after her, calling her name, but she ignores him. Breathing hard, she sprints down the yard, snow crunching beneath her feet. Tears are streaming down her face, and she furiously rubs them away with her sleeve. She doesn’t stop until she’s at the edge of the duck pond, just a few meters from the treeline. 

_ Oh, God. Oh fuck. Fuck! _

She had been absolutely terrified that the polyamory Megs and Cara had planned wasn’t going to work— that Ethan and Peter would decide to just be together without her— and here she is now. Alone, in the cold. The sun’s already set, so it’s dark, too. 

Despite the snow still falling, Ash barely feels the cold. Or maybe she does— she’s shaking,  _ hard _ , but until now she’s chalked it up to how upset she is. It could be the cold. 

Either way, Ash doesn’t really care. 

She sits at the edge of the pond, bringing her knees to her chest and ignoring the way the snow seeps into her jeans, and slowly calms down as she stares at the frozen-over water. Footsteps approach her quickly, and she can tell by the weight and pace that it’s Ethan. Ash wraps her arms around her knees, and wipes away her half-frozen tears. 

She doesn’t want him to see how deeply affected she is. 

“Go away,” she mumbles. 

“Ash, I—“ his voice breaks— “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have—“

“I said  _ go away _ ,” she snaps, tightening her arms and burying her face. 

Ethan doesn’t move a muscle, knowing just how bad he’s fucked up. He goes to sit next to her, hearing her sniffle. 

“Baby, please—“

“Don’t call me that,” she mutters, flinching away from him, and Ethan sighs, knowing he deserved that. 

“Ash, I’m not leaving you,” he says quietly. “I love you.”

She flinches again, wiping her nose on the back of her hand. The tips of her fingers are practically frozen solid, and her butt is soaked, but she doesn’t care. Ethan can tell, and hurriedly sheds his leather jacket off and tries to put it on her. She pushes it off, but Ethan’s persistent. Ash eventually gives up, letting the jacket rest on her shoulders. 

It’s still warm from Ethan’s body heat, and her shivering slows a bit. 

“Ash, I’m not going anywhere,” he whispers, cupping her face with one hand. She’s too tired to pull away again, and Ethan takes it as a good sign. “I love you so much,” he continues. “I shouldn’t have kissed him without talking to you first. I got ahead of myself, and I can never apologize enough for that.”

She sniffles, and leans into him. He wraps his arms around her and rests his chin on the top of her head. 

“I can tell you like him— or, you did,” he says quietly. “You weren’t as subtle as you thought you were. Kinda like us before we started actually dating. And um— I like him, too. And he likes  _ both _ of us, not just me.”

“You’re suggesting polyamory,” she mumbles. “Where we all date each other?”

Ethan nods, pulling back to look at her. “If you say no, then nothing else will happen between me and Peter, I promise,” he says softly, pushing hair back from her face. “You’re my priority, remember? You and me. Team California.”

Ash’s eyes slide to the left, looking over Ethan’s shoulder to see Peter standing nervously about halfway up the yard. She looks back to Ethan, searching his eyes for sincerity. It’s the only thing she finds. 

She leans in and presses her lips to Ethan’s, and Peter relaxes. He doesn’t come closer, though. 

When she pulls away, Ash rests her head on Ethan’s chest. “You should have talked to me first,” she mumbles, “but I can understand getting too excited about something.”

“So you wanna try it?” Ethan asks, and she nods against him. 

Ethan grins, waving Peter over. Ash shakily gets to her feet, and goes over to meet him halfway. Wrapping her arms around Peter’s shoulders, she hugs him close and buries her face in his chest. Ethan comes over and hugs them both from behind her. 

After a minute, Ash pushes them both off her. “You’re both freezing,” she says softly. “And so is my ass… let’s go back inside. I wanna put on some dry clothes. Ethan, you probably should, too.”

She takes one of each of their hands, and leads them back up to the house. Theo’s standing in the kitchen, right by the back door, eyes wide. They’d followed Ash to the front bedroom and had seen the whole thing.

“You’re an idiot,” they tell Ethan, shaking their head. “But you fixed it, so… um, congrats?”

Ash blushes, and so does Peter. Ethan just sighs, squeezing Ash’s hand. She squeezes back in reassurance.

“I’m gonna go change,” she mumbles, letting go of both Ethan’s and Peter’s hands. 

Going to the front bedroom, she closes the door behind her and quickly grabs a change of clothes from her backpack. She can feel her heart racing, no longer from anxiety, but rather from relief and excitement. 

Things are going to be okay, now. 

When she’s dry and a little warmer than before, Ash heads back out to the kitchen. Hannah and Tim are sitting at the table, now, coloring some pages that Theo had made for them. Theo’s making more, too, their hair dry and colorful. Ethan’s braiding it for them. 

Peter is the only one to look up when Ash walks back in, smiling shyly at her. She returns the smile, going over to sit next to him at the table and laying her head on his shoulder. Ethan sees, and grins.

Hannah sees, too, but she frowns in confusion, looking up at Ethan. Her confusion only grows when she sees his reaction. She taps the table to get Ash’s attention non-verbally, and points at Ethan when she has it. 

“It’s okay, Banana,” Ethan says. “We’re, um…”

Hannah’s eyes widen in panic. “Broken?”

“No!” Ash says quickly, lifting her head. “We didn’t break up, Banana. We just… added Peter.”

Hannah mouths the word  _ added _ silently, still looking confused. 

“Sometimes you can love more than one person, Hannah,” Ethan says softly, finishing Theo’s braid and crouching next to the five year old’s chair. “Your sister and me… we love each other, you know that, but we also realized we— we really like Peter, too.”

“It’s called poly,” Ash adds, reaching across the table for Hannah’s hand. 

The five year old glances between her sister and Ethan, narrowing her eyes at him as Webby explains it softly in her mind. “You hurt her first,” she accuses, and Ethan blushes, looking away in shame.

“It was an accident,” Ash says quickly. “He didn’t mean to, Banana. I forgave him already.”

Hannah’s hostility lessens as she looks back to her sister again. “Did you thank him?” she asks, which only makes everyone else confused.

“W-what?” Ash asks, tilting her head.

“Long time ago,” Hannah explains. “You said Ethan Green could step on you, and you’d thank him.”

Ash blushes furiously, while Peter and Theo both snicker. Ethan just smirks. 

“Did she?” he asks, and Hannah just nods.

“I—” Ash can’t come up with a reasonable response. 

“When was this?” Theo asks, and Ash shoots a small glare at them.

“Not helping,” she hisses, but Theo just smirks and shrugs.

“Old world,” Hannah mumbles. “Group chat.”

Theo and Ash both freeze, all playful hostility and embarrassment forgotten. They stare at each other, wide eyed, before looking at the five year old in the same way. Peter and Ethan glance at each other in confusion, and Tim’s totally not paying any attention. He’s completely focused on the picture of Batman and Robin that he’s coloring in.

“I’ll go get the others,” Theo says, looking at Ash again.

Ash scoops up Hannah, nodding. “I’ll grab Dad and Henry. Lab in five?”

“Sounds good,” Theo says hurriedly, before rushing off.

Ash hurries off, too, carrying a squirming and protesting Hannah in her arms.

Ethan and Peter just look at each other. “What the hell was that about?” Ethan asks. Tim knocks one knuckle on the table, and Ethan groans, fishing a nickel out of his pocket. “It’s a quarter if it’s the f-word,” he grumbles to Peter.

  * ~<>~•



Ted and Henry had been…  _ busy _ , when Ash had knocked on the door, so she paces in the lab while she and Hannah wait for them to make themselves presentable and join them. Theo, Megs, Cara, and Lucy arrive first.

Ash shakes her head before anyone can ask. “They’re c— they’re on their way,” she says, correcting her own word choice and shuddering slightly. 

_ And I thought walking in on my real parents in the old world that one time was bad enough _ , she thinks.

Henry and Ted slip in behind the teens, faces a little red and their clothes not quite sitting normally. Ash avoids looking at either of them, which tips off her friends. Megs and Cara snicker, while Theo pulls a disgusted face. Lucy groans. Ash sighs.

“Okay, we need to talk,” she announces, and Theo nods.

“Hannah said something in the kitchen a minute ago,” they add. “Ash and I think it’s important that Ted and Henry know the truth.”

“What  _ truth _ ?” Ted asks, looking very confused. Henry zones out for a moment, staring at a space on the wall just behind Hannah, before snapping back into focus.

“Holy sh—” he starts, then cuts himself off. “Fascinating… I have a friend in theoretical physics who would be very interested to know of this.”

“Webby just told you?” Megs guesses, and Henry nods. 

“None of you know how it happened?” he asks.

“How  _ what _ happened?” Ted asks, getting slightly annoyed at being out of the loop. Hannah fidgets, and he goes over to hold her.

“We—” Cara indicates herself and the other teens— “are from an alternate dimension.”

“Cara, I’ve known you since you were in diapers,” Ted deadpans. 

“Physically, we somehow already exist in this world,” Ash clarifies. “But consciously, we’ve only been here since Saturday morning.”

“It’s true, Teddy,” Henry says softly. 

“How is this even possible?” Ted asks, starting to look distressed.

“Black and White,” Hannah pipes up. 

“How does an ugly little monster doll gain a gigantic cult following?” Megs asks rhetorically, crossing her arms.

“How does anything weird happen, ever?” Cara adds.

“So how did you get  _ here _ , then?” Ted asks. “And how did you already know so much about Hatchetfield if you’ve never been here before Saturday?” He directs the second question directly at Ash. “And you knew what really happened with Charlotte!”

“Because in our dimension, Hatchetfield is a fictional town from a theatre company called Team Starkid,” Lucy says. “We all met through the internet, as fans of this company.”

“They’ve done two shows about the town, so far,” Ash continues. “Last year they did  _ The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals _ , and this year they’re doing  _ Black Friday _ .”

“ _ Guy _ is from an alternate version of Hatchetfield,” Theo says. “It’s about Paul and Emma fighting off the Apotheosis and… inevitably losing.”

“ _ Black Friday _ is about this apocalypse caused by Wiggly,” Henry guesses, and all five teens nod.

“Bad blood,” Hannah mutters.

“A different version of it, yes,” Ash says with a wince. “This exact version of events… is actually from a group chat the five of us were in together. We were role-playing what could have happened after the show ended, with some major changes. For one thing, um… we decided Ted was Lex and Hannah’s dad—”

“Who’s Lex?” Ted asks.

Ash blushes. “Um… me, I guess. In the show, I obviously don’t exist. Hannah’s older sister’s name is Lex. Ethan was her boyfriend… and he died to protect Hannah from the mob wanting the Wiggly in her backpack.”

“So… why did you replace this  _ Lex _ , then?” Henry asks, slowly getting a little more confused. Webby hadn’t mentioned this part.

“Another part of the role-play was adding in ourselves as other survivors,” Megs says. “Ash hadn’t gotten around to introducing hers yet, but she was playing Lex, so we think she ended up replacing her instead.”

Ash blushes again. 

“I mean…” Ted trails off, swallowing as he tries to think of the right thing to say. “So none of you remember anything that happened— from a personal perspective— before Saturday?” 

The teens all shake their head with varying degrees of rapidness. Ted keeps his eyes on Ash, though, who won’t look at him. He steps closer to her, gently holding her shoulders. 

“I don’t care about some girl you supposedly replaced,” he says softly. “I have memories of raising  _ you _ , Peanut.  _ You _ are my daughter, no matter what’s happened or what will happen.”

She bursts into tears, hugging him tightly. He holds her just as tight, rubbing her back. Hannah comes over to join the hug, clinging to their legs and looking up at them. 

“M-my parents,” Ash mumbles,”in the other w-world… they h-hated me being b-bi.”

“Mine too,” Megs and Cara both mumble. 

“Well, you all have  _ us _ now,” Henry says firmly. “That is, if you’ll have us.”

“None of them have much choice,” a new voice says from the doorway. Everyone turns to see a redheaded woman other than Becky standing there, and Ash gasps softly. 

“A-Aunt Judy?” She asks, then sighs when she takes a closer look and sees the purple eyes. “Webby…”

“What do you mean they don’t have much choice?” Henry asks sharply. 

“We don’t have to go back, do we?” Megs asks fearfully. Webby shakes her head. 

“No,” she says. “In fact, you  _ can’t _ .”


	10. Chapter 10: Truly Home

Megs doesn’t hear what Webby said, too absorbed in the sudden panic that grips her at the idea that she’d have to go back to  _ them _ . 

Even as Webby starts explaining why, Megs quietly stumbles back, and slips out the lab’s side door into the music room. She curls up on the couch, trying to steady her breathing as she makes herself as small as possible. 

Henry sees her leave, and glances to Webby. She gives him the slightest nod, continuing her explanation inside his head now, as well as out loud for the others. He follows Megs, and kneels on the floor in front of her. Megs flinches as he takes her hands in his, but slowly relaxes when she realizes it’s just him and not… one of  _ them _ . Her parents.

_ The force that brought you here was out of control _ , Webby’s saying. 

Megs can’t hear her, but Henry can. He listens carefully as he tries to soothe the girl in front of him. She’s softly whimpering, shaking from head to toe, squeezing his hands like they’re the only things grounding her to reality. 

Or to this dimension.

_ It was a portal similar to the one that General MacNamara used to access the Black and White, but less stable. _

Hannah comes into the music room, chewing on a chunk of her own hair. She goes over and curls up on the couch with Megs, who instinctively holds the little girl close. Megs slowly stops shaking, but she doesn’t stop whimpering.

_ P.E.I.P. opened it to try to access the alternate realities of Hatchetfield. They ended up reaching your world instead. _

“Megs,” Henry whispers, squeezing her hands. “Megs, sweetheart, I need you to listen to me. You’re not going back there.”

“Door’s closed,” Hannah mumbles.

“B-b-but…”

_ When they realized their mistake, they hurried to close the portal. In their haste, they accidentally dragged the five of you here.  _

“You can’t go back, Megs,” Henry soothes. “You never have to go back there again. As if I’d  _ let  _ you at this point.”

“N-never?” Megs slowly gets her breathing under control, looking up at the professor with tears in her eyes.

_ The portal has since been closed, and the device that created it destroyed. Even if any of you  _ wanted _ to go home, you couldn’t. _

“You never have to see those people again,” Henry promises. “You’re here, with us. You’re safe. You never have to worry about being ostracized for your orientation again.”

Megs nods slowly, her tears spilling over, but for a different reason now. She sits up, bringing Hannah with her, and Henry hugs them both. “They were going to kick me out,” Megs says quietly. “They’d just found out… about me. About the group chat-- they took my phone that night. Then I started feeling really sick, and m-my dad… he--”

“It’s okay, Megs,” Henry says, “you’re safe here, remember?”

She nods. “I puked everywhere, then passed out,” she mumbles. “Then I woke up in one of the spare rooms upstairs.”

“The nausea was from the portal,” Webby says, stepping into the room. “The unconsciousness was from me. It was safer for you all that way… no mortal is meant to see the inside of the Black and White. Sleeping meant you could bypass that safely.”

“But didn’t MacNamara, Cross, and the president all see it?” Megs asks. “I mean, in the show…”

“John died,” Webby reminds her. “Wilbur went mad and joined Wiggly’s side, and Howard is currently having a mental breakdown that has lasted since the events of his trip almost a  _ week ago _ .”

“Fair point,” Megs admits. 

“Stay?” Hannah asks, looking between Webby, Megs, and Henry.

“Yes, darling,” Webby says, coming over and stroking the hair from her mouth. “Megs, Ash, and the others all get to stay.”

“Stay,” Hannah insists, looking specifically to Henry as she squeezes Megs’ hand.

Webby chuckles. “She wants you to adopt Megs,” she says, and Henry blushes a little.

“I-- I could,” he says softly. “If you want me to, Megs.”

The teen sniffles and nods. “I’d really like that,” she mumbles, and Henry holds her closer.

“Me too,” he whispers.

  * ~<>~•



Ash sighs as Webby leaves. The eldritch being had appeared as the only member of her family who had accepted her for who she was, the only one Ash would miss from their old world. 

She goes over to the counter along one wall of the lab, and climbs up to sit on it, putting her head in her hands. Theo, Lucy, and Cara head back upstairs, leaving Ted alone with her. He goes over and rubs his hand along her back, and she flinches slightly at the unexpected contact before relaxing and leaning into him. She sniffles quietly.

“I have to tell Ethan and Peter, don’t I?” she mumbles.

Ted cocks his head to the side a little. “Um… yeah, you probably should tell Ethan… but why Peter?”

Ash quietly explains the polyamory situation, leaving out the part about Ethan kissing Peter. “They deserve to know what they’re missing out on by having me instead of Lex…”

“They’re not ‘missing out’ on anything,” Ted insists. “Just because  _ you _ don’t remember the relationship with him from before, doesn’t mean  _ he _ doesn’t. That kid clearly loves you. Maybe there’s another version of him that loved this ‘Lex’ girl, but this version-- the one that matters the most-- has no idea who that even is. And I’m sure Peter’s in the same boat there.”

Ash sniffles again, scratching at a spot on her inner left wrist. “She was so cool, though… minus the smoking. Tobacco’s gross.”

“Then she can’t be all that cool,” Ted reasons. She shakes her head.

“No, she was… it’s hard to explain, but her whole character just had this vibe… not to mention Angela Giarratana is like, really hot…”

Ted chuckles. “Ash, I promise you that Ethan and Peter won’t resent you for something you had no control over,” he says. “They won’t leave you for someone that doesn’t even exist in this universe. And even if they tried, I’d kick both of their asses into next year.”

“You’re a good father,” she whispers, hugging him close. He blushes a little, not used to hearing that kind of compliment, and certainly not from someone who means so much to him. He hugs her back.

“Want me to be there when you tell them?” Ted asks softly, but she shakes her head as she pulls away and hops down from the counter.

“No, it should be Theo,” she mumbles. Fiddling with her sleeve, she bites her lip. “Theo and the others…”

Ted sighs, but nods. He kisses the top of her head, before heading out the side door into the music room. 

Ash takes a deep, steadying breath, and goes out the main door and back up to the kitchen. Tom and Becky are sitting with Tim, now, and Peter and Ethan are nowhere in sight. She gives the two adults a small, nervous smile, before checking a few other places for her boyfriends. The living room, back porch, and rec room in the basement are all empty.

_ And I thought the singular version was gonna take some getting used to _ , she thinks, blushing a little. She gets to the front bedroom, where Theo, Cara, and Lucy are sitting… with Ethan and Peter. The boys are looking a little disheveled, and Ash narrows her eyes a little. She’s still wearing Ethan’s leather jacket, but his tee-shirt is looking more rumpled than it had before, his hair tousled. Peter’s glasses are crooked, and his bowtie is coming undone.

“What did I miss?” she asks, and Theo smirks.

“We just walked in on them making out,” they say, and Cara snickers. 

“Not cheating,” Ethan reminds his twin.

“No, we know,” Lucy pipes up, waving her hand dismissively. “It was just really funny to cockblock you guys like that.”

Peter buries his face in his hands, and Ash snorts. 

“We weren’t gonna--” Ethan starts, glaring at Lucy.

“I don’t wanna know if you were or not,” Theo declares, and their twin groans.

“We need to tell them,” Ash says softly, after a moment. Megs comes up behind her, eyes a little red and puffy from crying, but otherwise perfectly fine. 

“Tell us what?” Ethan asks, eyes narrowing.

“They’re going to murder us,” Peter mumbles between his fingers. “They found out about what happened before…”

“It’s not that,” Ash says softly, going over and sitting next to him on the bed. “It’s not about you guys, this is about us--” she gestures between herself and her four friends. “But… once you hear it, it might affect you guys, too.”

“You don’t want to date them all instead, do you?” Ethan jokes, sensing how nervous his girlfriend is. She gives him a small smile, and shakes her head.

Theo starts the explanation, and the others jump in at different points. All five talk about their home-lives from before, and how none of them were particularly satisfied with them. Megs mentions Starkid, and how it brought the five of them together, much more calm now that she knows she doesn’t have to worry about her (former) parents. Lucy talks about the group chat, Cara talks about some of the changes they’d made from canon for it, Theo talks about what Webby had said, and finally Ash talks about Lex.

They boys take it well-- if not confusedly. There’s a long moment of silence when the explanation is over. Theo, Lucy, Cara, and Megs file out of the room, closing the door behind them to give Ash some privacy with the boys. She bites her lip, not looking at either of them.

_ What if this doesn’t go well? _

Peter grabs her hand, rubbing circles onto the back with his thumb. Ethan gets up from the bed to sit on Ash’s other side, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. She leans into him, taking a deep breath as she slowly relaxes. Neither have even said anything yet, but she can tell from their body language that they’re not upset with her-- for lying, or for not being Lex.

“Not gonna lie,” Ethan says quietly, “I don’t think I understood half of what was just said. But it doesn’t matter, okay?”

Peter nods along, bringing Ash’s hand to his lips. His warm breath tickles her fingers. “The Lex girl doesn’t exist here,” he whispers. “ _ You _ do. That’s what’s important, Ash.”

She tears up, hugging them both. “I love you guys,” she whimpers. “Both of you, so much.”

They chorus quiet responses, holding her close between them. 

The door creaks open, and Ted peeks his head in. “Don’t mean to interrupt, just want to say one thing real quick, here…”

Ash sighs, pulling away from her boyfriends to look at Ted.

“Just remember what I said before,” he says softly, then smirks, “about no grandkids.”

Ash blushes furiously, jumping up and shoving him back out the door. “That’s  _ enough  _ out of you!” she squeaks, closing the door again. She leans against it, sighing. 

“You’re adorable when you blush,” Ethan teases her as she comes back over to him and Peter, and the statement only makes her blush more. It spreads to the tips of her ears, and Ethan tries to touch them, smirking, but she leans away with a small pout. Peter’s no help, kissing her warm cheek.

The sound of the doorbell interrupts whatever’s about to happen next.

With another sigh, all three of them get up and go to see who’s there. Henry’s already at the intercom, talking to whoever’s on the other side. It’s a young woman, and she sounds surprisingly relaxed for the apocalypse. Megs, Theo, and Ted are with Henry. 

“Come on,” she says, voice crackling through the speakers. “Please let me in? It’s freezing out here!” 

Megs eyes are wide as saucers when Henry opens the door for the young woman, and she catches a glimpse before Henry hugs their visitor.

“Holy…” she mumbles, staring.

Ash goes over to her, rubbing her back. “What’s wrong, Megs?”

“Good to see you, too, Uncle Henry,” the young woman chuckles, hugging the professor back.

Ash’s eyes widen in recognition, whipping her head between Megs and the newcomer. 

“Harriet?!”


End file.
